Tag Archives: Women and Men

Vacation’s Romances

If you can’t find sex under a blue sky, you can’t find it anywhere.

beach

heat relaxing

sunshine good times

high clear deep bluest sky

new friends open conversations

food wine music party suntanned girls

strolling sightseeing swimming sunbathing

dancing talking kissing friends romance love sex

late summer Mediterranean vacation’s fond memories

seem mostly of fleeting romance, transient love, casual sex

Jack Collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

not that casual sex on vacation is to be approved of

Sex, Love, and Heartache

Wherever I go, I always find that special person who is so wrong for me.

In the world’s largest financial centres, I spent most of my career making a hell of a lot of money by exploiting my knowledge of people and what makes them tick.  In London, Paris, New York, and Chicago I learned to read people, and know what they really want, need, and desire.  My skill was in matching the things I could do with what my clients thought they wanted.  And, for a long while, I was the acknowledged world expert in my field of esoteric banking.  But, really, my success was all due to the way I could use my interpersonal skills.

If I am so skilled at the art of interpersonal relationships, how come I can get it so wrong with women?  Some of the time I am forceful, passionate, prideful, self-indulgent, sensual, lustful, and too warm towards women who possess grace, beauty, and charm.  If I am very attracted to a woman I can be far too liberal with my affection, compassion, time, love, and money.  I tend to do a little too much by way of extravagances, and luxuries.  Maybe I send flowers too often.  And, as you would expect, sometimes these women take everything I can give without the slightest show of gratitude, appreciation, or affection in return.

A fool and his money are soon parted, especially when it comes to affairs of the heart.  ~  Thomas Tusser

Obviously I am not doing the right things, in the right way, at the right time, with the right person.  There isn’t the right balance, or sense of equilibrium.  And there’s the rub ~ we don’t choose who we fall in love with.

Something tells me that self-confidence, strength, and passion are a heady mixture which is not always under my control ~ I often let my emotions run away with me, and this can only lead to loneliness and heartache.

My past has been marred by decisions I made that have left me feeling disappointed and bitter.  It’s important for me to remember that I am accountable for my decisions.  What I need to do is reflect on those past choices in a frank and healthy way, without looking at the past through rose-coloured glasses, or sugar coating the choices I made in error.  I have made many bad choices, which then turned out very differently from the way I had hoped.

At times this has caused me much pain, worry, wasted time, and wasted money.  Perhaps I fool myself that I always tried to do my best, and that I always had good intentions at heart ~ but I don’t think so.  I did my best with the cards Life dealt me, but somehow things always took unexpected turns.

There may have been doubts in my heart which I ignored.  I was careless, and not always honest with myself.  I have often acted impulsively, with utter disregard for the consequences.  I have had the feeling of being utterly out of my depth, and I usually pressed on regardless.

Some say that we can only learn by our own mistakes.  And, that we don’t fail by falling down, we fail by  staying down.  All I know is that I’ve made some bloody painful mistakes.

If there’s nothing much about sex in the paragraphs I’ve written above ~ that’s because usually there hasn’t been any.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

Exactly the sort of woman I should have never been involved with.  Great legs do not necessarily a nice person make.

 

lusts wants needs desires

When I am true to myself, I am strong beyond measure.

the application of will

continues to tempt me still

uninhibited too dangerous thrill

urges wants desires needs emotional

uninhibited casual sexual relationships fill

my life with seductress midnight encounters

hazardous erotic carnal liaisons midnight hours

rash instant gratification sensual lustful animal urges

I know that I should have become a better man than that

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

the path to freedom from suffering

is through self-discipline in body, mind, and spirit

The Dark Night of the Soul

Only out of suffering emerges the strongest souls.

inner torment

jealousy and doubt

the demon soul eaters

visit in the blackest night

darkness lonely frightfulness

another run around nightmares

of lying half-truths dishonest deceit

she was a dark witch circling the firelight

she made it so very easy, and my soul was lost

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

not all women are witches

but all witches are enchanted women

never accept a kiss from a witch at midnight

cheap sex

Good girls go to heaven. Bad girls go anywhere with anyone.

night is falling

witch moon rising

she visits bars prowling

drinking, posing, hot flirting

touching, stroking, deep kissing

allowing anything, wanting everything

there is no friendship, affection, romancing

satisfying her promiscuous lust by just fucking

men half her age

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

 

 

 

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Acceptance and Understanding

Any fool can know.  The point is to understand.

In any real relationship there sometimes comes a point where the past raises its ugly head, and that’s where things can get complicated.  The problem is that if the past is not accepted and understood, then the future is going nowhere except into a slow-motion train wreck.

What is needed is real acceptance and understanding of the simultaneous past / present / futures.  For without that there is no real point in continuing any relationship.

What is acceptance, and what is understanding?  There is a big difference between reluctant acceptance ~ which is what most people descend to ~ and true honest understanding.

To reach the nirvana of true and honest understanding, there must first of all be true honesty.  And, in this life true honesty is as rare and fleeting as a double rainbow.

I have never before known real honesty in a relationship.  Perhaps excepting right now.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

unjustly accused

The average man ~ mostly harmless.

All men must have experienced that utter bewilderment when they thought they were doing something good, and that those they cared for would appreciate it, only to be accused of a wrongdoing they cannot comprehend.

I had that yesterday.

So now I don’t know what I did wrong, or where I went wrong, or even what I can do to put it right.

It hurts.

You know what that does to a man of any age?  We get defensive.  We mentally circle the wagons.  We can become difficult.  We can get the ‘go away and leave me alone’ and ‘I don’t love you anymore’ thing.

At heart men never grow up.  At heart men are not so tough, all we want to do is be around people we like and who like us in return.  Men are continually looking for approval and positive reactions.  Men are always trying to impress and show that we can do good things.

Yesterday I bombed out of all of that by mentioning in this blog that I wanted to go on a Caribbean cruise at Christmas without getting approval in advance from everyone close to me.  Wish I could have done, but people are not always just a ‘phone call away.

I got some passive aggression and some downright rejection in response to my innocent idea and blog post.

So now I feel dirty and worthless.

I’m not in love anymore, that was just silly phase I was going through.

I am just a lost soul, looking for my home.

Man the lifeboats men, this ship is sinking.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

light of selene

There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.

~

goddess of the moonlight

shine your love down on me

make it kind, strong, and bright

be with me in wanderings by the sea

never leave me alone again in the night

do you feel my heart beating, am I dreaming?

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

these days I always use a Lumix

Flowers for Friendship

the kiss of the sun for pardon

the song of the birds for mirth

you are nearer your love in a garden

than anywhere else on earth

~

 

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

Scenes on Sunday ~ Rocks

I know a cascading goddess who is soft for rock.

there is something of a paradox about rocks

building a pleasing stack to photograph locks

an ethical contemplative memory deep in my soul

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

I use a Panasonic Lumix 

it’s a great pocket / purse camera

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