Tag Archives: Women and Men

Sharing Love

love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies

Well, perhaps, but even in the truest of loves between the most compatible of people each of them has their own separate road to walk.  They may walk it together, supporting each other always, and the one may carry the other for a time, but each one wants / should / must have their own choices to make.  It is a truism that you cannot / should not / must not try to live another person’s life for them.

More than that, almost every adult craves their independence, needs their time alone, and wants to be able to make their own mistakes.  The thing about romantic partnerships and love is that the partners should be good friends, perhaps each another’s very best friend.  And the thing about very good friends is that you don’t always want to see them, but you always want to know that they’re there.

No man is an island entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main….. ~ John Donne

Sharing everything with your partner might sound ideal, and I guess many young lovers strive for that perfect ideal, but there is nothing worse in life than perfection.  Living in your partner’s pocket is claustrophobic, actually living with anyone every minute of every single day, month in and month out, would constitute a cruel and unusual punishment in most legal systems.  But solitary confinement is even worse.

How much you share with your partner, and how much of your partner you share with others is, like all of life, a balancing act.  But I would strongly suggest that sharing absolutely everything isn’t going to work for most people.

Here I can best speak for myself; a real, honest, honourable, steadfast, and true man.  And I need time alone, not fully engaged with anyone or anything other than myself, my innermost thoughts, and the Goddess of my understanding.  Men such as I tend to seek out solitary pastimes ~ I take long meditative walks by the sea.  But from time to time some company is nice.

Most men have very poor conversational skills in comparison to their female partner, so telling her about ‘everything that happened in my day’ is difficult for men.  Similarly, listening to her narrate her day’s events is hard for men.  And trust me on this; some of the things she may have done he will not ever want to know.  Men have very poor empathy in comparison to women.

And then; a man’s feelings, drives, and needs are very different from a woman’s.  He will not ever want to know about your past and the other men in it, and if he does a woman should worry.  The same goes for men in your present life, (coworkers and such).

People who want to know everything about you and live with you 24 / 7 are but one step from spying, stalking, and gaslighting.  Maybe ~ so give each other some space.

(there is a whole other set of meanings about ‘sharing’ in relationships ~ but I’m not going to go there)

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

most women would not want to be chained

not all the time anyway

Songs on Saturday ~ Cat Stevens

oceans apart, day after day, and I’m still in love

Either in lockdown in the garret, or prevented from travelling, or in a beautiful place on vacation…..  where ever I can go, and whatever I can do, I still cannot see my friends.  Especially I am not allowed to meet those I care for the most.

I may be only a solitary traveller, but love, true love, transcends time and space.

Please listen with your heart.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

purity, innocence, youthfulness

or a new beginning of everlasting love

Songs on Saturday ~ Sting

a lost man, in a lost world, on an endless quest for faith and truth

This song is for a friend of mine, who oft gives me the faith and strength to carry on when all seems lost.  When I’m down and troubled she lends a helping hand, she helps me to get up again, and strive once more to be a really great guy, living a very cool life.

A bit of Shakespeare, some Thomas Malory, and a reference to Alfred, Lord Tennyson in the video accompanying this song.  Who knew that Sting was educated and well-read?

King Canute’s real name was Cnut.  What a great T-shirt logo, if you were brave enough.

Please listen as you look to see if you have any great literature on your Kindle.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

knighthood’s dauntless deed

beauty’s matchless eye

Songs on Saturday ~ Londonbeat

she was the sun, moon, and stars ~ she was the love of his life

Nothing lasts forever, but some love affairs bring on the sun, so what does time matter?

Yesterday my sun was shining brightly, and that was enough to bring happiness and love into my life.  Who knows what tomorrow will bring?  All I know is that I am content today.

Please listen with a sense of fun.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

been there, seen the eclipse

shame I had to go to Wyoming

 

Monochrome Monday ~ Trim Bodies

half of all Americans are clinically obese  ~ that means they’re fat

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

plenty of fresh air and exercise

not much need for a calorie-controlled diet

Tunes on Tuesday ~ Harry Connick jr

how many can truly say; ‘I love you just the way you are’?

A little while ago I bought a Harry Connick jr album ~ A Celebration of Cole Porter.

Makes a change from ol’ Blue Eyes…..  Although Billy Joel also does a great cover of this fabulous song.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

just make certain the one you love has great legs

Random Jottings ~Nightmares

nightmares are your subconscious mind’s way of getting your attention

~

unrequited love is the most beautiful dream

and the worst nightmare

~

a dragon is never your worst nightmare

that would be a woman

~

your nightmares are as faithful as your own shadow

~

at night, your worst memories can never be held at bay

~

I still get childhood nightmares, but now I can remember them

~

in my worst nightmares, I have no mouth, and I must scream

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

in my waking dreams there are nothing but dark lonely regrets

Relationships, Friendships, and Love

I can’t stop loving you, no matter how hard I try

A couple of times in my life I’ve met someone I’ve really liked, and through spending time with her, becoming friends, having a relationship, I’ve found myself being in love.  Not on purpose, not because that was what I wanted, not because it was easy, not because she was perfect, and not because she was the girl next door.  Perhaps it was just meant to be.

Not all love lasts, but if you have ever truly been in love then you know that you first and most of all you are friends.  True friendship lasts forever.

And so, these are the thoughts I have about being in love.

  • Some say that you are lucky to find love even once in your life, so always hold her close, don’t ever let her go.
  • Let your the light of your love shine, even in the worst of times.
  • Even on the darkest of days her love makes every cloud carry a sliver lining.
  • You both enjoy the warm sunshine and the cold rain, just so long as you are together.
  • Whatever she says, whatever she does, she makes you happy.
  • You always tell her the truth, the whole truth, spoken and written from your heart and soul.
  • When she needs you, you are there for her, steadfast and true.  And she is always there for you.
  • If the road gets tougher, if times get hard, if life is difficult, then you love each other more.
  • When you are going somewhere together, no matter how late she is, you are happy to wait for her.
  • When she’s not there you miss her desperately, and you think about her always.  You dream of her.
  • You are happy to hold hands in public.
  • You listen when she speaks, and never talk over her.
  • You will be her steadfast friend, always, no matter what.
  • Even if she is a siren on the road to Hell, you desire her anyway.

Not all of the above is always true, not all of the time.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

when you are in love

she is your sunrise

Songs on Saturday ~ Jackie Wilson

love and music can change the world

Recently I’ve been pretty sick with this fucking terrible COVID-19 thing.  My symptoms were fairly mild, and I’ve pulled through fairly quickly.  One of the reasons I’ve recovered so fast is the support and love my friends have given me ~ that’s marvelous and it’s also helping now that I’m in lockdown.

This Jackie Wilson song is for them.

The Fred Astaire  / Ginger Rogers clip goes brilliantly.  And who ya gonna call…..?  (You have to remember Ghostbusters to get the connection.)

Please listen with my thanks.

~

jack collier

jack collier7@talktalk.net

and she did it all backwards

in tall heels

barefoot sand

she left her footprints in the sand ~ she left her love in my heart

~

and I dream of her

her touch her eyes her hair

the way she left footprints in the sand

as we walked along that quiet beach together

musical voice speaking of a future, her small soft hand 

resting gently in mine

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

a perfect day lasts for eternity

in our memories

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