Tag Archives: love

Gratitude

let us be grateful to the people who make our souls blossom

One of the most powerful emotional exercises I have ever been shown was to be grateful to those who have nurtured me, been kind to me, and had a positive impact on my life.  Practicing it was one of the few times in recent years that I felt floods of tears running down my face.

Being thankful and grateful is good for your spiritual, emotional, and mental health.  Those who exhibit higher levels of gratitude have better quality sleep, more positive moods, and less symptoms of possible cancers.  People who have a more thankful disposition are more optimistic, kinder, and make friends easier.

Unfortunately, in recent months I found it easier to see faults than find cause for thanks.  I lost sight of the bigger picture and focused on inconvenient and irrelevant details.  Focusing how miserable parts of my life were, I lost the ability to be thankful for what I have.  I had unrealistic expectations of what I thought I was entitled to, and so I was judgemental and complaining rather than kind, thankful, and friendly.

I had to change.  I couldn’t spend all my life feeling down at heel, trapped behind walls of my own making.  And then I remembered that if I wished to stand out and be successful I needed to be simply grateful and demonstrate sincere thanks.

What I needed was a complete shift in outlook, I needed to live with a positive mindset, be a glass half-full kind of man, always looking to be thankful for what I had, rather than complaining about what I didn’t have.  I needed to find things to give thanks for.  I needed to put gratitude and thanks ahead of criticism.  Graceful and empathic men  find it effortless to be a gentleman, to show gratitude to others, and never needlessly criticise other people and their actions.

If I thought about it, there is a hell of a lot I should be grateful for in my life.  So, in the past days I have begun to consciously show my thanks and gratitude, not just in words, but in deeds too.  Not only that, but I have started to feel grateful, even when there is nobody around to see.  You can judge the true character of  a man by what they do when nobody is around.

Some say that being grateful is a sign of weakness.  And there is no need to say ‘thank you’ if we simply get what we have a right to.  All I know is that there are people in my life I should be grateful for.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

I can be grateful for every new dawn I see.

Did You See Lisa?

the most beautiful things in life cannot be seen or touched

Back in the day, when I was an insanely overpaid guy in international finance, I guess I had one friend.  This was his favourite song.

Neither of us had ever known a Lisa, nor ever hoped to meet a woman by that name.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

this was our imaginary Lisa

Love’s Lost Friendship

whatever you want from me only love and friendship can give

~

I learned that I can still cry

sorrow is the other face of joy

to grieve silently is to be human

lost and broken and yet I’m a man

now all this friend can say is goodbye

you were the only love I’ve ever known

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

dawn in New Mexico

a better time to say farewell

Songs on Saturday ~ The Chain

lies, damn lies, and the whispered words of love

~

This song’s lyrics holds some brutal truths

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

if you don’t love me now

you’ve never loved me at all

I had a girl

the fundamental interconnectedness of all things

~

darkness unfolds into morning

the moonlight shines though

what am I to you?

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

Once I knew her

then she knew me

Be Yourself

losing yourself means accepting what others think of you

~

be yourself

in your bad dreams

be yourself

in your worst nightmares

be yourself

in dark desolate loneliness

be yourself

when all seems lost and hopeless

be yourself

be yourself because there is no one else

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

in the starry, starry night

be yourself ~ there is nobody else

 

Her Smile

just like those remembered days when the dawn sang

~

then quite suddenly I see

if you smile, not just for me

the world is a lovelier place

those tears have disappeared

all that sadness has vanished

the old songs never did end

and we walk again by the sea

remembering the you I adored

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

give your Goddess all the love you can

now that she’s gone

I pushed her away, into the evening light, a million miles away

~

from afar

where the night ended

a happy cry said it wasn’t over

and all at once I had it all

nothing else mattered

but my tears

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

wait ’till you see me cry

with tears of joy over my smile

Friendship and Truth

a single rose can be my garden ~ a single friend, my world

Many believe that just because they spend a lot of time with someone, then they are friends.  Or if they are lovers, then they must also be friends.  Or if they just like being with someone, then they must be friends.  Perhaps, and perhaps real and true friendship means much more than that.

Generally, two people are drawn together for some very simple and constantly repeating reasons.  And the most common of these is that they are co-workers.  It’s difficult to spend 8 hours a day with someone without wanting them to be your friend.  There are also some good reasons to be friends with your co-workers; like it gives you someone to go to lunch with.  On the other hand, I’ve worked very closely with people I hated ~ just couldn’t stand them, and outside of working together saw and spoke to them as little as possible.

Common interests also bring people together, for example liking the same sport, pastime, or hobby.  I became friendly with some people I went to a group with, but whether we were real friends is another matter.  I also became friends with some guys I played golf with, but outside of a liking golf we had few other things in common, (except we came from the same socio-economic background).

Common interests include some things that will never create true friendships; ‘drinking buddies’, drugs, gambling, casual sex, stealing….. generally things that people do after dark.

Shared values also bring people together, and here the list is long and strange.  We can include; truth and honesty, thrift and generosity, the church, religion, human rights, charitable causes, politics, green issues, animal protection, belief in a flat Earth, belief in UFOs, belief in extra-terrestrial civilisations, belief in past lives…..  The thing is, if people share the same values they also tend to create groups to support their values and special interests.  But, shared values are not enough to create a true friendship, they just bring people together.

Conversely, if two people have very divergent values they can never become true friends.

Of course, one reason people might say they are friends is if they are having sex.  Fucking someone doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re friends ~ probably people who just have sex are not real friends.  Some marriages might have good sex in them without the partners being true friends.

As far as I’m concerned, before yesterday I was never a true and honest friend with anyone, ever.  I suffer from a serious mental illness called Borderline Personality Disorder, and unless and until you are recovering from that you cannot ever be a real friend to anyone ~ there is just to much boiling shit going on in your mind.  Today I know I am recovering from my illness, and today I hope I have 3 friends.  Three is a good number.

Some say that honest people never hear the truth.  And that very honest people are very impolite.  All I know is that real friendship is based on honesty, openness, and trust.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

today there is a garden in my life

Tunes on Tuesday ~ Londonbeat

I can change the world, but I can’t change me

These days you can’t buy Londonbeat’s albums in any store I know of  ~  very rare just doesn’t describe it.

As you would expect this song is for a woman I know  ~  someone I’ve wronged in the past.  But that’s a much longer story than I can tell here.  (My one temptation was not another woman.)

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

this is Tower Bridge

not London Bridge

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