Tag Archives: interpersonal relationships

Tunes on Tuesday ~ Satisfaction

some things look better in black and white

While Californians were listening to drug culture bands like Jefferson Airplane, filmed in glorious Technicolor at Woodstock, we English were listening to bands like The Rolling Stones ~ here filmed in grainy monochrome in Ireland.  As a matter of fact we English thought everyone in California went around saying; ‘peace and love….’  If you said that here in the sixties you were likely to get smacked.

You decide which is better, The Stones or Jefferson Airplane.

Actually, I prefer The Beatles.

And we say ‘aeroplane…’

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

another 1960’s English icon

works Mini Cooper

Tunes on Tuesday ~ White Rabbit

I’m late, I’m late, for a very important date

In the 60’s and 70s we English were not listening to Californian music, so I have never heard this track from Jefferson Airplane before.  Woodstock passed us by with barely a murmur  The reason I’m playing it now is that we English greet or friends with; ‘white rabbits’ on the first of the month, which was yesterday.  (Of course there has to be an R in the month.)

Convoluted I know, and on first hearing I’m not certain I like Californian surfer-dude bands anyhow.

But hey, I like Jefferson Starship, so I’m certain that Jefferson Airplane will grow on me, like a weed.

This track probably sounds better if you’re high.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

To we English California is still

Alice through the looking glass

 

Monochrome Monday ~ Alone

it’s not good to be lonely, alone, and sick

I was hoping to feel better today, not suffering so much from the symptoms of low blood pressure, and whatever the underlying cause is.  Actually I do feel better, but that’s just comparing one level of distress with another.  I still have no energy, I’m still pretty much confused, and I still want to throw up.  We have a word; Manky, and that’s how I’m feeling this morning.

Hopefully I will get to see my own doctor today.

I’ll get through this.

The pictures are a visual expression of my mood.

It’s 6 months since I had a face-to-face conversation with anyone.

~

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

pretty much what lockdown for almost a year feels lke

Songs on Saturday ~ YMCA

I am not certain that real men are;
supposed to read Cosmopolitan

This video is so camp, and the song was such a dance favourite back when I used to go dancing.  Like being able to play billiards, being able to follow along to this dance is the sign of a misspent youth.

Just because one likes the Village People doesn’t mean that you’re metrosexual.

But, FFS never tell anyone that you’re metrosexual.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

She would fit into a gay band

 

Songs on Saturday ~ Bad Woman

some women do wrong just because of the buzz

This Beth Hart song reminds me of a couple of women I used to know very well indeed.  They would steal, gamble, drink, and be amorous just for the buzz it gave them.  For all I know they still do.  There was no harm in any of it.

Women like that are fun.

But you will probably get burned.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

at least it’s only wine

this time anyway

gin is worse

Self-Control

if you learn self-control, you can master anything

waste in a wasteland

It’s Lent, which is all about abstinence and self-control.   There doesn’t seem to be much self-discipline, self-control, or mastering difficult challenges about in the world today.  Rather there seems to be a lot of neglect, waste, and self-indulgence.  It’s waste of human life in a wasteland.

Addictions such as alcoholism, gambling, smoking, drug-taking, eating disorders, infidelity, and inappropriate casual sex seem to be rife ~ even among our senior politicians and bureaucrats, who are supposed to set an example to we ‘ordinary people in the street’, suffering the miseries of lockdown.  I myself have had a drinking problem, but I am pleased to say that I haven’t touched a drop since Christmas.  (There are none so self-righteous as a reformed addict.)

I am happy to tell you that I have learned self-discipline, self-control, and how to master difficult challenges.  It wasn’t easy, but I am getting there.

All we have to learn is how to say ‘No’, especially to ourselves.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

hanging around in bars is not an indication of self-control

 

Lent 2021 ~ 17th February to 3rd of April

nothing great is ever achieved without much enduring

~

Lent is a time for abstinence, for giving up something that’s important to you.  In my case I have given up on something that used to be important, and I will stay away from toxic relationships all through Lent and beyond.

The other two things I am giving up are alcohol and candy.  For one thing booze is definitely not good for me, and neither is too much sugar.  People who suddenly become sober tend to eat a lot of candy to make up for the sugar they’re not getting in booze.  I have been scoffing quite a lot of candy this year.

So the three things I am giving up for Lent, and beyond are:

  1. Dysfunctional and toxic relationships.
  2. Alcohol in all its forms.  (I have not had an alcoholic drink since Christmas 2020)
  3. Candy, chocolate, and what we English call sweets.

Instead of all that I am going to work hard at being fitter and healthier.

Please wish me luck.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

women who drink to excess are no longer a part of my life.

Happy Valentines Day

I hope you all have a wonderful day

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

a red rose just for you

Finding Mr. Right

people believe their own myths

many women would like this as a daily drive

This is not about where to go to find a real man, this post is all about sorting the good guys from the poseurs, fakes, chancers, and abusers.  If you disagree with any of this, then feel free to comment, or even email me.

What do women want?  Somebody to provide for them, protect them, take care of them, shower them with gifts, take them to expensive places, buy them expensive clothes, get them a fabulous home and a cool car.  A good looking and powerful man to be seen with and to watch over them ~ perhaps even a sugar-daddy type.  Maybe not somebody to talk with.  If women want a deep and meaningful conversation they will talk with their women friends.

The deep-down basic wants, needs, and desires in a relationship are different between men and women.  Men want sex, whereas women crave affection and intimacy.  Men want power and domination, women want equality and respect.  Women are about nurturing and soft skills, men are by nature unfeeling.  Women want a loving and caring relationship, most men don’t even know what that means.

Men are usually not being their true selves when they first meet a woman they are attracted to, especially if it’s a casual meeting in a bar, or a first meeting after chatting on some dating site.  Most men will talk too much, exaggerate their good points, minimise the downsides, and outright lie.  Most men will gloss over things like; they are already married, divorced with kids, or have been let go from their work.  If you get that far they may say things like their good car is in the shop, their place is being redecorated, they forgot to call at the ATM….. There’s a price for that because when the mask slips, a woman may find she is talking with mr boring or the beast.

Signs that a guy is actually worth the time of day is that he wants to know about you ~ without being creepy or an obvious stalker.  He will not talk over you.  A cool guy will tend to be self-deprecating because he has the self-confidence to be honest and open ~ without puffing himself up like a slimy toad.  A man worth talking to will be clean and well dressed, (appropriate to wherever you are).  No real man will ever be drunk or high and talk to a woman.  And no gentleman will fuck you on a first date, because good guys don’t often date sluts.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

a cool guy will always politely and appropriately compliment your appearance

Men Don’t Do Relationships

women need and desire to be cherished, understood, loved
men want sex

Men evolved as solitary hunters, and their main contribution to the human race was the ability to hit a moving target so that everybody could eat.  Sometimes several men from the same tribe gathered together as a cooperative team so they could kill something bigger so that more people could eat.

Any woman reading that will immediately see where the male fascination with sports comes from.  Sports are all about the ability of one man to hit a moving target, often with the help of the other players on his team.  Cricket, baseball, football, basketball ~ lady, you name it and it’s the same thing ~ personal responsibility, hand-eye coordination, spacial awareness, calmness under pressure, hitting a moving target, instant gratification, win / lose.  And it comes from tens of thousands of years of evolution.

This is one reason why men like to wear uniforms, hats, colours, insignia that indicates their personal competence and membership of a successful team.  Teams are not discussion groups, a sports team is really a hunting and killing machine.  Every man feels that he is perfectly capable of solving his own problems and does not see any reason to talk about them with anybody else; up to and including you.  This is the reason a man will never ask for directions ~ real men do not use in-car satellite navigation because the damn woman keeps on offering advice.

Nowhere in there does it say anything about feelings, discussion, emotion, nurturing, understanding, socialising, and asking for help.  Men are not wired to discuss, listen, feel, accept, empathise, or talk just for the sake of talking.  Most of the time when a woman really wants her guy to show some empathy and understanding what he will do is offer her a solution.  He thinks he is being caring and loving by solving her problems, and she knows he is being uncaring and indifferent, trivialising her feelings by not listening to her.

Actually most good men try to listen to their lady, but what he hears is the blah blah blah of moaning, nagging, complaining, and talking just for the sake of talking.

When men do talk it’s usually in a language women do not easily understand; either because it’s technical or it sounds like monosyllabic grunting.

A woman may dream of and desire a perfect man, but smart women know that ‘perfect man’ is an oxymoron.  In many ways her perfect man would be gay, or at least metrosexual ~ and what real woman would want that?

Real men just don’t do non-sexual relationships ~ unless they are prepared to try, try, and try again.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

Marmaduke is a male bear

he likes sitting all by himself

thinking about nothing much

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