Tag Archives: Enlightenment

Disillusionment and Enlightenment

For now we see through a glass, darkly.

Life is a matter of contrasts and changes.  Perhaps one cannot truly know joy and pleasure, unless we have also known suffering and pain.  Perhaps one cannot set out to walk the warrior’s path without first knowing what it is like to hit a rock bottom.  And, I believe that one cannot realise what truth is without having been deceived and lied to.

I know that to achieve enlightenment we first have to be sorely tested by crushing disillusionment and the temptations of listening to our darkest inner demons.  It seems that Life is all about balance; light and dark, good and bad, yin and yang, male and female, disillusionment and enlightenment…

The real meaning of enlightenment is to gaze with undimmed eyes on all darkness.  –  Nikos Kazantzakis

Without balance I was a one-sided person, the man in the mirror, a creature ruled by my inner demons and character defects.  I was angry, disillusioned, jealous, judgemental, and filled with negativity.  I was both unpleasant and unkind.  And, of course, I was unhappy.

Some things have changed.  I have admitted my faults and confessed to my wrongs.  I was able to be contrite and penitent.  Most importantly, I was willing to recover from the deep psychological and spiritual illnesses that beset me.

Over the last few days I have been feeling much better.  Over the past few days I have been able both to pray and meditate.  And, over the past few days I have begun to know an inner peace.

Enlightenment means to know and practice acceptance, kindness, open-mindedness, understanding, and wisdom.  Enlightenment means redemption.

From my small understanding of life, quantum mechanics, relativity, and spirituality, l firmly believe in the interconnectedness of all things.  I firmly believe that disillusionment and enlightenment are as interconnected as night and day.  I firmly believe that one cannot truly know enlightenment unless one has first known the misery of disillusionment.

Trust me, I have known the misery of disillusionment, and now I am walking the warrior’s path towards true enlightenment.

Jack Collier






Wants, Needs, and Maslow

Do you believe, in the clear white light?

Before one can make a plan, we first have to decide what we are trying to achieve.  What do we really want, need, and what do we dream?

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs says that all sane people are motivated to achieve the same needs, wants, and desires – and that some needs take precedence over others.  The most basic needs relate to physical survival; air, water, shelter, food, sleep, stability, safety, and sex.  It’s interesting that Maslow regards sex as a basic need – and I tend to agree with that.  All creatures expend an awful lot of effort just to get sex – usually with the aim of passing on one’s genes to the next generation.

In human terms, a lack of good sex can destroy a relationship, no matter how many of the other basic and higher needs a relationship provides.

There are lots of different versions of Maslow’s pyramid / triangle but they all acknowledge that the brute physical needs are the basis of everyone’s life.  You can’t easily work on self-actualisation when you’re thirsty, cold, and hungry.

There is another basic need which isn’t mentioned in the pyramid I’ve shown; Health.  Unless you are healthy and fit, in body, mind, and spirit it’s difficult to work on any of your higher needs.  Indeed, if you are really ill it’s hard to work on anything except recovering from one’s illness.

Recently, (or for years and years), I’ve been pretty sick in my mind and spirit.  My thoughts have been dark and meaningless.  All of my worst character defects have been to the fore.  I have been angry, blaming, jealous, judgmental, uncharitable, and lacking in love for myself and others.

Ergo, one of my basic needs is to recover my mental, psychological, and spiritual health.  Whatever plan I make, whatever I do, I need to make recovery from mental, psychological, and spiritual sickness my first priority.

I need to walk the warrior’s path towards the clear white light of love and true enlightenment.

I know that this will not be easy, and I know that I will need help.

I believe that if I am sincere, and I ‘walk the walk’, I can recover from the darkness that has been tormenting me.  I hope that someday I will vanquish the demons deep within my soul.

Jack Collier



You Are Not A Prisoner Of Time

Time Is An Illusion. ~ Albert Einstein

DSCF0037Time is not a universal constant.

Time passes at different rates and in different ways depending upon who we are, where we are, what we are, why we are counting time, and how we measure time.  There is no such thing as an absolute past.  There are probably an infinite number of futures for us to choose from.  The present isn’t just now, the present also encompasses the past and the future.  My perception of time and my reality is different from yours.  Most importantly, we are not trapped by time, we can choose to use and take advantage of time as we will.

Time is not constant and one minute is not the same length as another.  ~  Jeanette Winterson

Subjectively we know that time passes at different rates depending upon circumstances.  If you’re stuck in an airport departure lounge waiting for your much delayed flight, then time passes painfully slowly ~ the minutes seem like hours and the hours crawl by like a wounded fly.  Conversely, if you’re getting ready for a really hot dinner date, then the hours fly by, and there’s just no way you’re going to be ready on time.

Scientifically, time also passes at different rates depending upon how fast you’re moving, and how much gravity there is where you are.  In the world of quantum mechanics time may, or may not, exist at all.

We choose to examine a phenomenon which is impossible to explain in any classical way, and which has in it the heart of quantum mechanics.  In reality it contains the only mystery.  ~  Richard Feynman.

The present, your ‘now’, isn’t only the present.  This instant of ‘now’ also includes the past and the future, and both the past and the future can and will change in a way that’s dependent upon now.  Once you accept that time is not an immutable constant you have the ability to change your future, your present, and your past.  Changing your own past is called retrocausality.

Everything, and I mean every moment of joy, happiness, sadness, trauma, learning, experiencing, dreaming and imagining, everything that has ever happened to you, and everything that you have ever done is present in the now.  Mostly we just aren’t consciously aware that the past is with us in the here and now.  But, without your past you wouldn’t be able to walk, talk, drive, hold down a job, or maintain a loving relationship.  The downside of this is that all the bad things about us were created in the past.  All the anger, attitudes, insecurities, jealousies, phobias, and mental illnesses are from the past.  But, you do not have to be a prisoner of your past, you have the ability to change the past.

The future is also with us in the present.  Everything you do is dictated by the future.  You most likely will go to work on Monday, and that’s dictated by things that will happen much further in the future than Monday.  If you don’t go to work, then somewhere in the future you may lose your job, and then your home, because you can’t pay the rent / mortgage / local taxes.  If you knew for certain that the Second Coming of Christ was going to happen this Christmas, then most likely you wouldn’t go to work on Monday.  The future changes and creates the present, and the present changes the future.  The more brave choices you make in the present the greater number of possible futures you have to choose from.

We can choose from our possible futures, but most people are very bad at making brave choices.  Almost everyone will do tomorrow what they did yesterday, with exactly the same people in exactly the same places.  Those people have made the choice to make no choices at all, and the more they do that the fewer possible futures they have to choose from.  If nothing changes then nothing changes.

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.  ~  Albert Einstein

We can choose to change our past.  After all, the past is only what we remember and how we interpret those memories.  If you had an abusive childhood, then in all likelihood it will have blighted your whole life, right up to the here and now.  Trauma in your childhood could have left you with Alcoholism, Borderline Personality Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, or any of a number of other psychological problems.

You can change all that and have a good life now by reinterpreting the past ~ after all the past is only memories.  I can’t tell you how to do that, you may need counselling or psychotherapy.  However, I can tell you that I stopped the past from blighting my present by unconditionally accepting who I am, and acceptance created a whole raft of new futures for me to choose from.  Today I am enjoying enlightenment and empowerment because I changed the past in my present.  Today I have more futures to choose from because I changed the subjective past.

You can change your own past, your present, and your future.  All you need to do is to have the willingness to change.

please listen responsibly


WAF Landscape Christmas Cards.qxdthese opinions are mine and mine alone

jack collier



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