Marmaduke

Everything in Life I share with her,
except of course my teddy bear.

He’s my best friend ~ apart from a girl.

~

~

~

~

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

Scenes on Sunday ~ Reprise

Tales of Brave Ulysses

On my travels again, but no girl riding shotgun.  Sad really.

~

~

~

~

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

Not Sleeping is Very Bad

Insomnia turns an earthly paradise into a place of torture.

If you don’t fall asleep within 20 minutes of getting into bed and turning off the lights, if you toss and turn and wake up several times in the night, if you don’t wake up feeling instantly refreshed and ready to hit the ground running, then you are not getting enough good sleep.

Scientific studies show that for good health almost everyone needs 7 or 8 hours of good sleep, every single night of their adult lives.  Not getting enough good sleep does really bad things to you.

Just some of the bad effects of lack of sleep are; depression, diabetes, fatigue, heart diseases, heart attack, high blood pressure, poor immune system leading to illness, impulsive behaviours, irritability, paranoia, stroke, suicidal thoughts, and Death.

All of us know exactly that some of the things some of us do from time to time will prevent us from sleeping well at night; not getting enough fresh air and exercise during the day, drinking too much booze, eating late at night, using social media late at night, not going to bed at the same time every night, staying in bed late at weekends, having unresolved issues that prey on our mind, having an untreated mental illness, having our bedroom too warm, too noisy, and not dark enough, being in a dysfunctional relationship, hanging out in bars, casual sex…..

I’ve got a bad case of the 3.00 am guilts ~ you know, when you lie in bed awake and replay all those things you didn’t do right?  Because, as we all know, nothing solves insomnia like a nice warm glass of regret, depression, paranoia, and self-loathing.  ~  D. D. Barant.

Some things that most of us do will disrupt our internal body clock, our circadian rhythm, and prevent us from getting a decent night’s sleep, for night after night after night.  Who knew that our internal body clock is so important to good sleep and good health?  If you do stuff that fucks up disrupts your internal body clock, resulting in a lack of good sleep, you will seriously damage your physical, mental, and spiritual health and fitness.

All the things that will help ensure that we will always have a good night’s sleep are so bleeding obvious that a child of 5, or 6, or 7 already knows them, instinctively.

  • Stick to a sleep schedule.  Go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, including weekends and vacations.
  • Get plenty of fresh air and exercise.  Get out and walk for an hour a day, (10,000 steps), but not too late in the day.
  • Get plenty of sunlight during the day ~ tricky if you live in northern England like me, (or Canada, or Alaska, or Scandinavia…).
  • Avoid caffeine later in the day.  It’s a stimulant, and the caffeine in a cup of coffee will take about 6 or 8 hours to wear off.
  • Do not smoke.  Nicotine is a stimulant, smoking affects your breathing, you will get nicotine withdrawal through the night and wake up, you will have nightmares for years after you stop smoking.  Smokers never sleep well.
  •  Booze.  Don’t drink to much, especially late at night.  A glass of wine / hard booze just before you go to bed will stop you from getting a decent night’s rest.  Trust me, people who drink late at night, most nights, are three parts of the smegging way to being an alcoholic.
  • Do not eat late at night.  Don’t eat anything much for a couple of hours before bed-time.
  • Don’t take a nap after three in the afternoon.
  • Have a relaxing hot bath just before bed-time.  Light some candles, play some relaxing music, turn off your racing mind.
  • Have a dark bedroom, quiet bedroom, cool bedroom, gadget free bedroom, and no fucking blue light from your phone / tablet / computer shining all night.
  • Forget all the bad things from the day, especially the ignorant son of a bitch person who cut you up on the freeway on your way to work.
  • Finally, if you just cannot get to sleep, then don’t just lie in bed fretting.  If you really cannot sleep, get up and do something else instead, (but none of the bad things listed above).

One thing that some doctors say will result in a restored sleep cycle and better sleep is using marijuana, pot, cannabis.  There are some serious downside risks to the cannabis user, such as; anxiety, breathing problems, poor coordination, damaging a child in the womb, hallucinations, heart attacks, impaired thinking and cognitive functions, nausea, road traffic accidents, smoking anything is a known health risk, suicide, paranoia and schizophrenia, being arrested, losing your job, and Death.  All other drugs you can take to help you sleep are worse than marijuana, especially in the longer term.  (Anyhow, I would never sleep with anyone who uses drugs.  Come to that, I wouldn’t have lunch with a drug user.)

Some say that going without sleep for night after night is dangerous.  And, that eventually going without sleep will kill you, after 11 days or so.  All I know is that not sleeping is very, very unpleasant.

~

Insomnia

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

you may be able to tell that I didn’t sleep well last night

 

a witch with angel eyes

I had my share of nightmares
didn’t think there could be much more
then in walked Rodrick Usher with the Lady Elanor

only the moon and stars know,

where you got those pretty blue eyes,

that smile while you tell such elegant lies,

you must have fallen down from out of the sky,

you must be some sort of witch to torment a guy,

who’s unwise as to fall hard for your delicate disguise,

your every word of tenderness a tormenting sweet caress,

but I know just who you are, and I know your long goodbyes.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

she sang me a starlight sexual lullaby,

a thousand times, or maybe more,

and in the end, she didn’t care

Know What You Don’t Want

A wise man doesn’t try to get what he doesn’t want.

Many people don’t know what they want out of life, and many of them struggle to find a way to discover their true needs, want, desires, and dreams.  Even if you know what you most need, want, desire, and dream of having ~ well, whatever it is might be very difficult, or almost impossible to acquire.  This applies especially to friendship, love, sexual desire…..  in fact anything that relies upon another person doing what you want is always going to be an almost impossible dream.  You have no control whatsoever over what another person thinks, feels, likes, dislikes, loves, or hates.

Your most important “want” should be the one you can control.  ~  Shannon L. Alder.

You cannot make her / him love you, desire you, or even like you.

It follows therefore, that in our journey through life, at some point we should work out what we truly, honestly, realistically need, want, desire, or dream of having.

And this is where most of us come unstuck.  We have no idea what it is that we want ~ other than our life goes on pretty much as it has always gone on, without us having to think about it too much, or wandering too far outside of our own comfort zones.

We Just Do Not Know What We Really Want.

However, all of us, or almost all of us, know what we don’t like about our life.  Almost all of us know exactly what we hate about our lives.  Most of us know exactly who and what we want to walk away from, and after that never, ever, keep in touch.

Some of us can tell exactly when there’s an elephant in the room ~ we know when there are important issues that are not being discussed with our significant other, and instead all we ever seem to talk about is meaningless trivia.

Many of us know that our wants, needs, desires, and important dreams are not being fulfilled.  We know that we are frustrated and unfulfilled.

Therefore, as a first step to knowing what you really want, write down what you know you don’t want.  Write down what you don’t like about your life.  Write down what you hate about your life.

Be honest.  Be brutally honest with yourself.

Do not censor yourself ~ just write down what comes into your head.

Don’t over-think things, just write, whatever it is and however bad it seems.

You will have to force yourself to confront the real and damaging issues in your most private life, instead of just focusing on fluffy easy minor annoyances.

Most likely you will not complete your list of dislikes and hates in one short attempt.  Keep your list safe, and add to it whenever you think of something else that disturbs your quest for a fulfilling inner peace.

And, most importantly, DO NOT let anyone else see this list of the things and people you hate and what you hate about them.

For example, your partner / wife / husband may not be happy to know that you think she / he is as sexually responsive as a wooden plank.  You know what, if I had a significant other / partner / wife like that, then I’d hate that too.  (Trust me, I’d hate it, I’ve been there.)

Most likely, if you’re brutally honest with yourself,  sex will feature heavily on your list of things that aren’t going right for you.  After that, probably your job, your home life, your friends, health, fitness, enjoyment…..

My current list of things I don’t like / hate about my life has 34 things on it, and I’m telling nobody what they are.

But now I have a good idea of what I don’t want, I can start to get what I do want, by any means necessary.  (As long as the means I use are legal, honest, and ethical, I will do whatever it takes to get what I truly need, want, desire, and dream about.)

When you know what you want, and you want it bad enough, you will find a way to get it.  ~  Jim Rohn

Some say that success is getting what you want.  And that happiness is getting what you need.  All I know is that I’m damn certain what I don’t want in my life.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

I would like to go back to California again

 

 

Mr. Plod the Policeman

There are two people in your life you should never lie to

Lying to ‘Plod’ is almost never a good idea.

It seems had occasion to use the word ‘Plod’ a couple of days ago, and in my version of the English language ‘Plod’ means the Police.  And then I started to think just how many other words we English have for a policeman, or the police in general.  Turns out there’s quite a lot.

But, perhaps it’s not such a good idea to use these slang words around actual policemen, or police women.  Especially don’t say cuntstubble to a WPC.

  • the Bill ~ a shortened form of ‘the Old Bill’.
  • Bizzies ~ a Scouse word, (from Liverpool), meaning the police are always too busy to spend time investigating ordinary crime affecting ordinary people.
  • Bluebottle ~ from Cockney Rhyming slang ‘bottle and glass’ meaning arse.
  • Bobby ~ Sir Robert Peel established the Metropolitan Police in 1829, and Bobby is a short form of Robert.  (Also see Peelers.)
  • the Boys in Blue ~ Self-explanatory, the police wear blue uniforms.
  • Constable ~ a word from English medieval times when a constable was a King’s officer of the peace in armies and castles.  English policemen aren’t officers, they’re constables.
  • Copper ~ an old English word meaning ‘someone who captures’ ~ weird, I thought it had to do with a constable’s badge.
  • the Cops ~ from ‘Copper’.
  • Crusher ~ English Victorian slang, from ‘beetle crushers’ a slang name for the heavy boots Victorian policemen wore.
  • Cuntstubble ~ a very derogatory modern term for a female police constable.
  • the Filth ~ no idea what the etymology for that is, but it’s a pretty derogatory word.
  • the Fuzz ~ again I have no idea what the etymology for that is, but it’s another derogatory word.
  • The Heat ~ said to refer to the red lights some police vehicles carried ~ I doubt that very much.
  • the Law ~ obvious.  But also a shortened form of ‘the Long Arm of the Law’.  Like Canadian Mounties the British police always get their man ~ eventually.
  • the Met ~ London’s Metropolitan Police ~ the largest police force in England.
  • the Narcs ~ an undercover narcotics agent ~ also a police informant.
  • the Old Bill ~ who really knows?  It’s a strictly London term, and I suspect it’s some very nasty cockney rhyming slang.
  • the Pigs ~ just derogatory and originating in 19th century England.
  • Peelers ~ From Sir Robert Peel ~ see Bobby above.
  • Plod ~ Mr. Plod the Policeman is a character in Enid Blyton’s Noddy books.  But if you’ve ever seen an older policeman walking, then you’ll agree that they do plod along.
  • Polis ~ Scottish / Glaswegian slang, and if you’ve ever heard a real Glaswegian talk you’ll know why they say Polis for Police.
  • Rozzers ~ 19th century English slang of mostly unknown etymology.  It may be from Polari slang, (homosexual slang).
  • Scotland Yard ~ this was where the police force was first established in London on October 6th 1829.  (Great Scotland Yard at the rear of 4 Whitehall Place).  The headquarters of the Met. are always called Scotland Yard, (now New Scotland Yard).
  • the Sweeny ~ cockney rhyming slang ~ ‘Sweeny Todd’ = ‘Flying Squad’  The Flying Squad is an elite arm of London’s Metropolitan Police, the Met.
  • the Thin Blue Line ~ describing all that’s between the ordinary populace and anarchy.
  • Woodentop or Woody ~ a uniformed police officer, a derogatory term used by plain-clothes detectives.

As you might expect, many of these terms are more than just a little bit derogatory, and the one’s that aren’t date back to Victorian times.  Anything from London is more than likely cockney rhyming slang.

Of interest to my American friends, an Englishman would never, ever call a policeman ‘Sir’.  That honorific term is only used for someone an Englishman really respects, for Example a very senior member of our Royal family.  Sadly, these days not many Englishmen respect the police any more.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

standing outside of 10 Downing Street,  they are a pair of proper policemen, in proper policemen’s helmets

I’ve Been Thinking of Someone

women are to be adored, and perhaps understood

The weather in this little northern town has been pretty good today, for England in May that is.  Ergo I took a myself for a walk, and that turned into 11 miles of physical effort, mental introspection, and spiritual enlightenment.

While I was walking I thought of a woman I know.

I don’t know her as well as I would like.

This song is for her.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

a man will never find the Goddess of the moon by searching for her

Scenes on Sunday ~ Utah Skies

cloudy skies bring hope for some, of cleansing rain to come

~

~

~

~

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

all these great shots

were taken by

the cool girl riding shotgun

Dunkirk ~ Escape to Victory

On the 26th of May 1940 Operation Dynamo commenced ~ the Miracle of Dunkirk

History provides many examples of the British Army being asked to operate under appalling handicaps by the politicians responsible for British policy…..  Major General Mason-MacFarlane 15 May 1940

In six weeks from May 10th 1940 the Germans invaded western Europe, defeated the then allied, armies and conquered Belgium, France, Luxembourg, and the Netherlands.  This was the Battle of France.

Because of the supine performance of the Belgians, and subsequent pathetic surrender of most of the French, the British Expeditionary Force, (BEF), found itself beleaguered and cut off from its supply routes, then pushed back into a pocket around the French port of Dunkirk.

The campaign in France and Flanders was lost in Whitehall and in Paris before it ever began….. ~  Montgomery

In stark contrast to the craven Belgian and French generals, who were prone to bursting into tears at times of crisis, the British behaved with courage, fortitude, and stoicism during that most difficult of military operations, a fighting withdrawal while still in contact with a superior enemy.

One cannot belittle the steadfastness of the soldiers of the BEF, their discipline and morale under the most testing circumstances ~ of retreat, uncertainty, and the ever present scourge of the Luftwaffe.  ~  Julian Thompson

The BEF fought on as a fantastic plan was hatched to evacuate as much of the army as possible back to England.  This evacuation from Dunkirk was given the code name Operation Dynamo.

With the support of the RAF, (Royal Air Force); the Royal Navy, the Merchant Navy, and the immortal Little Ships, the bulk of the men and women of the BEF were lifted from the shores of defeated France and brought safely home to England.

All in all, 338,226 British and Allied troops were landed in England from Dunkirk between 27th May and 4 June 1940.  239,555 were lifted from Dunkirk harbour, and 98,671 were plucked directly from the beaches.

Almost all of their equipment was lost, but the men and women of the BEF were rescued, and that allowed Great Britain to fight on, alone against the Nazi scourge.

On June 4th 1940, after it was all over, Sir Winston Churchill said, (as part of a much longer speech given to Parliament):

We shall go on to the end…..  we shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and the streets, we shall fight in the hills, we shall never surrender…..  Churchill

The Army would not return to France in force for another 4 years and 2 days.  Without the Miracle of Dunkirk, Britain would have been defeated by the Nazis,  and then D-Day ~ Operation Overlord could not have happened on June 6th 1944, and all of Continental Europe would have spent decades under the sadistic boot of Hitler, and then, after Herr Hitler’s inevitable demise, Europe would have suffered that even worse monstrous dictator, Stalin.

This only proves that English determination, steadfastness, stoicism, and sheer bloody-mindedness are better than Gallic passion ~ on a any day of the week.

An Englishman, a Briton, will never surrender to tyranny from Europe.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

Coronia, previously HMS Watchful, one of the Little Ships at Dunkirk, currently undergoing restoration in the marina at my home town

Food on Friday ~ Memorial Day

one of sour, two of sweet, three of strong, and four of weak

And that’s how to make Planters’ Rum Punch, an Englishman’s preferred drink to go along with a summer barbecue.  The strong is Caribbean Dark Rum, (or try Woods 100), and the sour is fresh lime juice.  You can guess the rest ~ (simple syrup and iced water).

Well now, this coming Monday, the 28th of May, is Memorial Day in the USA.  It’s also the Spring Bank Holiday here in Great Britain.  For some of us this is the first real day of summer, more or less ~ although the weather in most of England and America hasn’t been very summery of late.

Particularly in the USA, this coming Monday is the time to clean the cobwebs of that old barbecue, dust down the patio furniture, invite some friends overs, and hang out in the yard eating, drinking, and shooting the shit breeze.

So, for this week’s Food on Friday I’m going to feature stuff that goes well with kicking back outdoors.

I know a very nice American girl who really likes cilantro and lime.  So, first to the BBQ this week is Jessica Merchant from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania and her blog How Sweet Eats.  Jessica has this cool recipe for Cilantro Lime Flank Steak, and while it will only take you 20 minutes to cook in the broiler, you need to start marinading the steak on Sunday.  Make plenty and take the leftovers to work on Tuesday, (if there are any leftovers).

Cilantro Lime Flank Steak

From San Diego we have the sunshine girl Averie with her Grilled Steak Kabobs, (funny we call these things kebabs in England).  You will want a good top sirloin steak for these rich looking skewers.  Again, these will cook very fast on the grill, but you want to allow at least 4 hours for the marinade to work.

Grilled Steak Kabobs

If you don’t like steak, then what about these Honey BBQ Chicken Kabobs from Chungah at Damn Delicious.  Again this dish will only take you 20 minutes to cook on the grill, but you need to allow a couple of extra hours for the marinade to do its work.  Looks tasty to me.

Honey BBQ Chicken Kabobs

To go with all this meat you’re going to cook on your freshly cleaned BBQ, you’re going to need some salad, and from Andrea at Cooking with a Wallflower, we have this good looking dish; Avocado Corn Caprese Salad, dressed with a honey balsamic vinaigrette.  Looks so delicious and refreshing.

Avocado Corn Caprese Salad

From the Californian White on Rice couple we have a very different Grilled Romaine and Corn Salad, something you can make on your BBQ in under half an hour ~ while you’re grilling your other vegetables too.   (If you’re cooking any vegetables…)

Grilled Romaine & Corn Salad

I know that most of you like the recipe collections I feature, and here’s another one. From Olive magazine we have the 32 Best Ever BBQ Recipes to help you enjoy the sunshine this coming Memorial Day.  I particularly like this very quick and easy recipe for Miami-Style Blackened Fish Sandwich with Smoked Paprika Mayo ~ ready in just 20 minutes.  Me, I’d use salmon, tuna, or swordfish to make a really top-notch blackened fish sandwich.

Miami-Style Blackened Fish Sandwich with Smoked Paprika Mayo

Should you want to make a dessert for your guests, then Elise Bauer at Simply Recipes has found us a collection of 9 Crowd-Pleasing Desserts for Your Memorial Day Party.  I particularly like the look of this Lemon Poppy Seed Bundt Cake recipe by Cindy Rahe.

Lemon Poppy Seed Bundt Cake

And finally this Friday, for those of us who aren’t content just to suck back beers, we have another collection from Wide Open Eats, 20 Best Big Batch Cocktails for Backyard BBQs and Lazy Sundays.  As a very practiced consumer of alcoholic beverages I particularly like the look of this Pitcher Hurricane Cocktail.  this recipe is to make a gallon of the stuff.  Personally I’d just tip in a whole bottle of both dark rum and light rum, (and I’d also miss out the metrosexual umbrellas), but that’s me for you.

Pitcher Hurricane Cocktail

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

the English version of Memorial Day is observed on Remembrance Sunday, as near as possible to November 11th

It’s a solemn occasion.

%d bloggers like this: