absence makes the heart grow fonder

jealousy is also destructive

It’s Day 346 of a very strict lockdown here in England, and for me that means that I haven’t been able to see my dearest friend for over a year.  I had plans to meet with her, and that hasn’t worked out.  I know that there are millions of people kept apart because of the coronavirus travel restrictions ~ so I’m not alone in suffering unhappy frustration.  Thanks to the miracle of the internet it’s possible to keep in touch with friends and loved ones, but even a video conversation is no substitute for the real thing.  There is nothing like the touch of a human hand.

I don’t know about other people, but I find that long-distance conversations tend to drift into unsatisfactory banal and emotionless platitudes.  It’s hard to say what one really feels, (fuck it’s hard to know what oneself really feels), when you can’t look into another person’s eyes and read their body language close to.  It occurs to me that things could have been worse, but degrees of unhappiness still equal despondency however one measures it.

Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.  ~  Thomas Fuller

There is no easy way to say this, but I believe that only very special friendships and love can survive long periods of being apart.  I do not believe that absence makes the heart grow fonder.  I believe that absence just creates a longing that only being together can satisfy.  And, that when two friends and lovers can finally be together after a long time apart, they will be lucky if their relationship survives much beyond the meeting.

What has occurred while they have been apart may only serve to twist the knife.

I do hope your separation from your friends and loved ones will make your hearts grow fonder.  I hope, dream and pray that I can survive being apart from my friends, and that it will not result in bitterness and some personal heartbreak.

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

one day there will be air travel again

no one knows when that might be