Finding Mr. Right
people believe their own myths
many women would like this as a daily drive
This is not about where to go to find a real man, this post is all about sorting the good guys from the poseurs, fakes, chancers, and abusers. If you disagree with any of this, then feel free to comment, or even email me.
What do women want? Somebody to provide for them, protect them, take care of them, shower them with gifts, take them to expensive places, buy them expensive clothes, get them a fabulous home and a cool car. A good looking and powerful man to be seen with and to watch over them ~ perhaps even a sugar-daddy type. Maybe not somebody to talk with. If women want a deep and meaningful conversation they will talk with their women friends.
The deep-down basic wants, needs, and desires in a relationship are different between men and women. Men want sex, whereas women crave affection and intimacy. Men want power and domination, women want equality and respect. Women are about nurturing and soft skills, men are by nature unfeeling. Women want a loving and caring relationship, most men don’t even know what that means.
Men are usually not being their true selves when they first meet a woman they are attracted to, especially if it’s a casual meeting in a bar, or a first meeting after chatting on some dating site. Most men will talk too much, exaggerate their good points, minimise the downsides, and outright lie. Most men will gloss over things like; they are already married, divorced with kids, or have been let go from their work. If you get that far they may say things like their good car is in the shop, their place is being redecorated, they forgot to call at the ATM….. There’s a price for that because when the mask slips, a woman may find she is talking with mr boring or the beast.
Signs that a guy is actually worth the time of day is that he wants to know about you ~ without being creepy or an obvious stalker. He will not talk over you. A cool guy will tend to be self-deprecating because he has the self-confidence to be honest and open ~ without puffing himself up like a slimy toad. A man worth talking to will be clean and well dressed, (appropriate to wherever you are). No real man will ever be drunk or high and talk to a woman. And no gentleman will fuck you on a first date, because good guys don’t often date sluts.
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jack collier
jackcollier7@talktalk.net
a cool guy will always politely and appropriately compliment your appearance
Monochrome Monday – Overnight Stops
I couldn’t let her suffer in a spooky down-market hotel
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jackcollier
jackcollier7@talktalk.net
actually, for her, I could
Random Jottings ~ Argument Winners
being right will not necessarily win any arguments
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I don’t care what God said…..
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you might be right, but I don’t agree
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I don’t pretend to know everything
but I know I’m a lot smarter than you
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she was making one mistake in her argument
she assumed that I gave a shit what she thought
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why do stupid people think that shouting will win an argument?
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ridicule and humiliation might win arguments
but they don’t win friends
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jack collier
jackcollier7@talktalk.net
it’s damn near impossible for any man
to win an argument with a sexy woman
Scenes on Sunday ~ Overnight Stops
I could never let you suffer in a down-market hotel
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jack collier
jackcollier7@talktalk.net
there aren’t many good hotels in Jerome
Songs on Saturday ~ Harry Connick Jr.
so many want to change the one they first fell for
I’ve been lost, I’ve been alone, I’ve despaired, and I’ve drank. Now I know that there is someone out there for me, I never need to walk alone. I know that when I find her I’ll care for her for who she is, not for who I want her to be.
I never need to walk alone, unless that’s what Fate decrees.
And Fate had better watch out.
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jack collier
jackcollier7@talktalk.net
she’s not the one
she never was
Songs on Saturday ~ Chris Rea
I’m never going to wait in line again
This Chris Rea track speaks to me, he’s singing about how my life was, how it is, and how it’s going to be. I know that boardwalk and I know those streets. I know how it feels to be trapped , waiting in line, waiting for something better…. Not a VW, and California, not Europe.
With thanks to Paula Light for this prompt.
Pick up up your life, stop waiting, get on and do it.
Get a car, get a girl, and get out of town.
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jackcollier7@talktalk.net
Monochrome Monday ~ Arizona
in reality, the Arizona desert is monochromatic red
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jack collier
jackcollier7@talktalk.net
road trip
Red Rock State Park
(poetry anthology on Amazon)
Make Things Happen
nothing happens unless first we dream
That Jigsaw Does Turn Into a Car
The first step in almost every journey is knowing where you want to go. The first step in any project is knowing what it is that we want to achieve. To achieve anything meaningful we must first have some sort of a plan.
We choose to go to the moon in this decade….. ~ President John F. Kennedy
Less than seven years later Neil Armstrong was the first man to step onto the surface of the moon. The whole Apollo program cost about $25.4 billion, and that dream only took about a thousand years after the rocket was invented in China. The lesson is that to realise our dreams we must not only have a plan, we must also have the means and the perseverance to keep on going when it all seems hopeless.
There are a couple of pertinent lessons from history;
If at first you don’t succeed try, try, and try again. ~ Robert the Bruce
and perhaps this more interesting and valuable piece of advice;
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results. ~ Albert Einstein
However, one must always remember that some dreams are totally misguided and the projects they turn into become utterly stupid delusional chimera. One example of a dream turning into a South Sea Bubble is Tesla, the Californian manufacturer of expensive electric cars. Despite that their least expensive Model 3 costs some £39,000 in England, and their most expensive roadster will set you back about £200,000, it will take about 1,600 years for the company to earn back the amount of money invested in it. Frankly, I think you’d be better off investing in bitcoin, and that’s the investment equivalent of playing roulette.
A fool and his money are soon parted. ~ King James Bible
The dreams of most men revolve around the equilateral triangle of money, sex, and power ~ and the greatest of these is money. Given enough funds most men can get all the casual sex they want. And, if you have enough money, some ‘friends’ and lots of perseverance, even a stupid man can become very powerful. I cite Presidents Trump and Biden as my examples.
Some say that the mark of a man is not what he achieves, but what he longs to achieve. And that all human activity is driven by desire. All I know is that we should be very careful what we set our heart on ~ we may get it.
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jack collier
jackcollier7@talktalk.net
that’s supposed to be an ark
oh Good Grief!
Poetry Anthology
Seascapes and Serenity Lost
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You can probably learn more about me by reading some of my poetry anthology than you could ever learn from anything I ever posted on here ~ and I have promulgated some gritty and very personal stuff.
Anyhow, my anthology is now available on Amazon, in several important countries, including the US, UK, and points east. (For some good reasons, for the next few days the print copy is ‘author only’)
The words and pictures are all my own work, and there are a lot of photographs interleaved with the poetry.
I am also deeply indebted to Jan Olandese, who edited the whole thing.
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jack collier
jackcollier7@talktalk.net
the shining sea
talks with me
Being Popular
being known by a lot of people is not the same as being liked
very well known, and very unpopular with some
Little did I think that eventually this blog would have had 200,000 hits. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think that’s a lot for a blog written by a bloke. Especially considering the eclectic mix of stuff I write about, and how controversial / opinionated / difficult the topics I choose can be. It would appear that I can be prone to lecture at times.
Looking around at WordPress it seems to me that blogs written by women attract a far wider readership than my efforts, and that they receive far more comments than my posts do. It could be that’s just my perception, but I don’t think so. And, I can think of several good reasons why both women and men comment more on a blog written by a female than they would on a blog written by someone who is an obvious guy.
But, just because this blog has now had 200,000 hits doesn’t necessarily mean that either it or I am popular. Maybe it only means that I’ve been around a long time. The oldest post still on here is dated 17 November 2013 ~ since then there have been another 1,924 posts that still exist, and 10,311 comments. (Along the way a fair amount of crap posts have been trashed.) So I may neither be popular, nor well-liked ~ just old.
I could court popularity, or write a blog specifically designed to attract the greatest number of followers, the highest number of hits, the most likes, and a constant stream of comments ~ but I’d have to decide why the fuck I was doing that. Getting lots of attention would flatter my ego, but not necessarily in a good way. To me, courting popularity is one short step away from promiscuity, and I have very mixed feelings about that. I’d far rather be true to myself, think and believe what feels right and proper, write what I want to write, say what I need to say honourably, honestly, and openly.
Anyway, sorry if I disabuse you, but mostly I write this blog for myself.
In real life, in the past, I have courted popularity, because back then my self-esteem was lower than a snake’s belly. I firmly believed I needed the positive affirmation of others to feel worth anything. How sad was that?
Some say that popular people are better people. And that if you’re not popular then you’re nobody. All I know is that popularity is not the same as quality.
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jack collier
jackcollier7@talktalk.net
Marmaduke is very popular
he’s a very cool bear