Category Archives: Photography

Sexual Infatuation

’tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all

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this is what becomes

ashes to ashes

iron to rust to dust

desperate desires

love to hot lust

strong sexual fires

knowing he must

possess her always

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

perverted sexual possession

disgusts the right-thinking man

The Danger of Expectations

I am not in this world to live up to your expectations,
and you’re not in this world to live up to mine

I didn’t expect her to do that at the dinner table

One of the reasons my life was such a mess was that I had some expectations from a relationship that were no longer being met.  I was and am far too attached to a woman, and being in love with a woman always leads to expectations, and in my experience expectations always leads to bitter disappointments.  Those disappointments were making me very confused, is it infatuation, lust, desire, love, an emotional need, or a dysfunctional friendship?  And how does a normal guy find a way through that Dionysian maze?

Expectation is the root of all heartache.  ~  Shakespeare

No matter how hard I tried I could not free myself of the expectation that I deserved an emotional, sensual and sexual friendship where the love I thought I felt was returned freely and fully.  That is the big danger of having expectations, often they are unrealistic, often they lead us to believe that we deserve something or someone, and quite often our expectations are a million miles from the reality of any given situation.

Also expectations are passive, we don’t need to actually do anything to have huge expectations.  Expectations are the result of feelings, and I should know that feelings are often false and the result of twisted programming hard wired into our subconscious mind before we were seven years of age.  Feelings are not real, and our feelings often have fuck all to do with what’s going on in the real world.

We should never blame people for disappointing us, we should blame ourselves for expecting too much from them, or expecting things from them that they can’t give to us, or don’t want to give us.  We should never blame others for our own negative feelings of anger, jealousy, misery, resentment, sadness…..  Our feelings belong only to ourselves, we should own them, and if our feelings are distressing us don’t try to change the world, that’s too difficult, we should change ourselves instead.

Expectations can be as trivial as expecting a nice day, as important as expecting a pay rise at work, or as destructive as thinking you love someone who doesn’t love you.  Unrequited love is incredibly painful, trust me, I know.

We always want what we can’t have, life is so cruel that way.

Some say that if we don’t expect the good things from life then all we will ever get is dross.  And that we have a right to expect to get what we want the most.  All I know is that I’m still trying to find a way to stop loving someone.  You’d think a man would know.

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

and I expected a great beach-front hotel

Monochrome Monday ~ Erotic Smoking

sometimes smoking is a highly sexual act

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Jack Collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

most will find this picture erotic

Scenes on Sunday ~ California Road Trip

the life you have led doesn’t need to be the only life you have

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

sometimes, only a convertible Mustang will do, with a very cute girl riding shotgun

The Guiding Light Shines

set your course by your bright guiding light

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My ship was sinking

I was lost and alone

on the savage seas

inside my own mind

I could be very blind

and viciously unkind

dishonest and drinking

feeling fear and dread

then your bright light

pierced fog and gloom

shining far out to me

guiding me home

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Storm wave

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

my guiding light shines

Beautiful Sad Sex

Beautiful, and yet sisters cannot mend a broken heart

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I am so lucky to have known such a beautiful woman, that held me tight in her heart.

We have been friends for such a long, long time, it meant so much.

Some times I just don’t know anything about love.

I thought we were made for each other.

Maybe it was never meant to last.

Maybe I was wrong to trust.

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

always the same that’s all

it’s just a shame,

that’s all

Monochrome Monday ~ Roads

a long exciting road trip is my favourite vacation

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Jack Collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

Roads in the USA are much more fun than in Europe

Monochrome Monday ~ Sexual and Sensual

seduction begins with the pictures you create in her mind

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

some say that there are many sexes

and that you don’t have to choose

all I know is that most people like sex

The Garret ~ where I call home.

I don’t let women into my apartment; the garret is too private for that

A little while ago I posted a picture of Marmaduke in the apartment I call ‘the garret’ ~ it’s about 100 yards from the sea, and it’s where I call home.  Some people were kind enough to say that my place looks nice, so I thought I’d show you some more of where Marmaduke and I hang out.  We have a rule; Rule #2 nobody is allowed in the garret ~ I would never bring a woman back here.

Quite often we turn off everything electronic, switch off the TV, turn out the lights, and relax in the silence of flickering candlelight. There may be little silence within me right now, but I have discovered a calmness and quiet peace in the garret, a safe haven from both the outside world and mine own demons.  All I need to do is sit in my favourite chair, light a few scented candles, and turn everything off.  I turn out the lights, switch off the TV, turn off my computers, and shut down my raging thoughts and extreme emotions ~ and what I have left is silence.  Almost darkness relieved by the flickering candlelight.  And then there is some measure of quiet in my mind.  For that time I can feel calm, happy, warm, friendly and loving towards others, and at peace with myself.

In those moments of inner silence there is no stress, no lust, anger, jealousy, paranoia, resentment, no anxieties or depression.  I can allow myself, my being, my heart and my soul to drift whither it will.

When I bought the garret, the kitchen was dark and dingy, with black marble counter-tops and dark wood cupboards.  So, I ripped that out and installed / built what you see here.  I never use plumbers, electricians, or any other kind of contractor.  I think that 99.9% of contractors are crap, they do a shoddy job and charge a fortune for doing it.  I do everything myself, I even built a lot of the furniture in here.

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

computer and record player

Marmaduke and I listen to some cool music

Scenes on Sunday ~ Anywhere But Here

travelling far turns you into a storyteller

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jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

in a December’s winter I would rather be almost anywhere but here.

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