Category Archives: Writing

Songs on Saturday ~ Billy Joel

people disappoint, passion is ephemeral, pasta is eternal

A long, long time ago, I can still remember when this music used to make me smile.  That was before I started wearing Italian suits, dated an Italian girl, bought an Italian car, and almost married into the Jacionelli Family.  Suit Ferragamo, Shoes Gucci, Car Alpha Romeo, Girl Sophia, Ice Cream Jacionelli.

Some say that you can’t ever truly know a woman until you’ve taken her out for dinner to your favorite little Italian Restaurant.  And that you will never what she’s going to look like when she’s older until you’ve met her mother.  All I know is that I’d rather have an Alpha Romeo sports car than a Morris Oxford.

History may be repeating itself ~ as history does

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

beautiful, expensive, temperamental

Random Jottings ~ Lies and Deceit

a deceiver will always find one who wishes to be deceived

~

the instant gratification of booze is a devious deception

~

it is better to be lied to than to become a liar

~

seduction is a form of deception

you know she can fool you at any time on any given day

~

love never dies a natural death

love is always killed by dishonesty, deception, and distrust

~

first appearances are not always deceptions, just mostly

~

be careful who you trust

the devil was once an angel

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

the worst thing about being lied to

is knowing that you weren’t even worth the truth

Random Jottings ~ COVID-19

you can take social distancing a little bit too far

~

save the world, stay at home and watch TV

~

social distancing is just like being shipwrecked

~

practice social distancing and don’t hoard toilet paper

~

it’s sad when self-isolation is just like your normal life

~

without utter solitude, working from home is impossible

~

COVID-19 is a deadly virus, kill it stone dead with soap and water

~

you’re more likely to die of a heart attack, in the bath, than you are to die from COVID-19

~

between 60% and 90% of positive COVID-19 tests are false positives

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

when life is a shipwreck

sing campfire songs

Random Jottings ~ Friendship

a friend when you are in need, is a friend indeed

~

friendship isn’t a test of endurance

~

friendship is not a deal, it’s a state of being

~

true friendship asks no questions and tells no lies

~

if your lover isn’t your best friend, then it’s just casual sex

~

a real friend is like a spring of cool clear water in the desert heat

~

he isn’t your friend if he makes you feel like you’re always walking on eggshells

~

your best friend is your starlight and your guide when you are lost in the darkness

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

a friend will find you

no matter where you are

 

Random Jottings ~ Strange Love

love can be an intimate connection and a dreadful bond

~

love makes you do strange things

~

she hears you before you have spoken

answers you before you’ve formed the question

and she loved you before you ever dreamed of her

~

and then, in walked the witch

the electric broomstick was bad

her fuck-me stilettos were a bitch

but the pearl choker was just sadistic

~

erotic witches aren’t all bad

they just like to behave that way

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

memories of

sex, secrets, sins

lovers, lies, lusts

desires, demands

resentments, regrets 

Random Jottings ~ Jealousy

jealousy is self-inflicted torment

~

true jealousy is both love and hate

you can’t have one without the other

~

‘I’m not jealous…..’ she averred

right before she totally trashed his Porsche

~

jealousy is a symptom of passionate insecurity

~

if you get into a passionate long-distance relationship

then expect to get very jealous

~

you can’t talk to a jealous woman with a shotgun in her hand

~

jealousy isn’t ever about real love it’s really about deep insecurity

~

actually, it’s perfectly acceptable to be jealous if your partner is cheating on you

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

real jealousy hurts

and there is never any cure

sometimes staring at the sea helps a bit

Random Jottings ~ Trust

he trusted her implicitly,  right until she threw him to the hungry crocodiles

~

everybody’s got to trust sombody sometime

of course that’s where it all starts to go wrong

~

everyone who says; ‘you can trust me…..’ is a liar

~

all women lie, just ask Adam about the apple and the snake

~

for some the excitement lies in knowing how far they dare trust

~

never ask a woman about her past

because lies of omission are still lies

and the truth will torture you

~

never trust a man who professes to be your friend

real friends don’t need to tell you that

~

trust doesn’t usually include your partner taking a vacation without you

~

I never knew a woman who didn’t want to know how much money I was making

up to, and including, my sainted mother

and all of them wanted proof

~

Jack Collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

women who have first date sex are always liars

or sluts, or hookers, or older than their date

or all of the above

lost love’s journey’s ending

the heart’s darkest wilderness is not a place of this Earth

~

I have journeyed far

through Xanadu, Samarkand, Shangri-la, and Elsinore

I traveled not for love alone

but to fulfill my quest, meet my fate, and free my soul

my heart torn apart by ardour

I wandered by the mountains of the moon’s raging river

in darkest passion’s burning fervour

I could take the pain and stand the rain as should warrior

a warrior proud, steadfast, alone forever

I wouldst take you far to Shangri-la, a land of never never

so join me, my princess most proud and fair

be my Lady, my Goddess, Queen of Camelot and Elsinore

to be together, as it ’twere long ago and before

lost love’s journey’s ending, together now and forevermore

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

darkness cannot drive out darkness

only the dawn’s early light can do that

Random Jottings ~ Track and Trace

we shall meet in a secret place where social distancing isn’t known

~

in-car satellite navigation isn’t private

~

the Police are being taught how to say;

‘Papers Please…..’ in a menacing voice

~

who controls the past controls the future

~

as far as his recent lovers went, his lips were sealed

ever since he used a pritt stick instead of lip-balm

~

‘sorry babes-o, can’t meet for lunch, I’m having my microchip fitted’

~

these days, when you book a call girl there’s a hell of a lot of paperwork

~

we all leave tracks in the sand

we just never expected that the government would follow them

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

she had no objection to telling them who she’d slept with

but she couldn’t remember all their names

Random Jottings ~ Mad Scientists

and so he created a woman, who got angry when her batteries ran down
~

he was smart, but he could never get a girl

so he made one

~

every mad scientist dreams of playing God

the really crazy ones believe they are God

~

keep you arms in the time machine at all times

~

‘that’s strange perfume…..’ he said

that’s not perfume, it’s formaldehyde…..’ she answered

~

they had solved the theory of everything

and after a few bottles of booze they thought it was a good idea to build a time machine

things went downhill after that

~

jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

 

she must be a scientist

she’s wearing a white coat

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