better a diamond with a flaw than a rock without
There are some groups of people I just have no time for, dislike intensely, and don’t ever want to have anything to do with at all. These groups include; cyclists, economists, loud drunks, people who think they drive well but should never have been allowed on the road at all, dog owners, graffiti ‘artists’, litterers, politicians, rap ‘artists’, vandals, and the fools who believe that all persons are created equal.
Not everyone in those groups is a horrible person ~ if you look hard enough you can always find a diamond among the dust.
Actually, one of my very best friends loves her dogs, and another is a cleric.
Please listen responsibly.
not all bicyclists are unattractive
and then the rain clouds came crashing into my life
well past midnight again
in a bar dismal and alone
looking out on hard rain
I’m feeling like hell in here
sadness, sorrow, and pain
she was ever the only one
can’t be scared of the dark
it’s pulling my heart apart
losing a girl you love hurts
let it rain on me, let it rain
some people enjoy the rain
others merely get wet
the infinite elation, pain, and terror of a psychological illness
friendless and nowhere to go but here
About a month ago I was in hospital, and so ill that the nurse said that I looked like a bad advertisement for death. I had lots of scans, tests, and examinations, some treatment, and after a few days I was discharged, supposedly fit and healthy. I believed I was cured of my ills ~ I don’t believe that anymore. I think I’m still very unwell.
Whatever ails me does not seem like a physical illness ~ I’m still meeting my 10,000 steps a day meditative walking target, I’m not sitting in the armchair all day, too knackered to do anything but watch TV, I haven’t taken myself to bed, and I’m not on any medication at all. I don’t think my body is sick, I think it’s my mind.
(I take some of that back, when I comes right down to it I’m physically not that strong.)
I have a very strange set of unmatched symptoms. To begin with there is the red V shaped mark on my forehead. It’s prominent, angry looking, and if you met me it’d be the very first thing you noticed. I’ve had that red V shape appear on my forehead ever since I was a young boy, and it has always been a certain sign that I was pretty poorly.
It’s like having the mark of Cain, and it tells me that in one way or another I’m fucked.
The headache I’ve got now I’ve had for three or four days. Everything I eat tastes like cardboard, (apart from chocolate). And I’m dropping things; keys, books, a full mug of coffee, (that makes a hell of a mess), and this morning while I was doing the laundry I dropped the electric iron. That thing was plugged-in and hot, but I didn’t want it hitting the tiled floor in my kitchen pointy end first, so I caught it before it hit the tiles. How the fuck I had the presence of mind to catch the iron by its power-chord I have no idea, but I did and I didn’t get burned.
Oh, and another thing, I am saying and writing the F word a lot, (and a few other choice cuss words), and that is just not the polite English Gentleman I am usually.
Generally I feel like a young boy who has been sent to see the school headmaster for a dressing-down and some corporal punishment, and that young boy hasn’t a clue what he’s done wrong, or why he’s being punished.
You know what? I think I haven’t been so well lately.
Some say that the sick never truly lose the chaos within. And that a sick thought can devour your being more thoroughly than a fever. All I know is the bravest thing I ever did was continue to live when I wanted to die.
feeling like that lost little boy today
even the unloved and abandoned can have a strange beauty
Aston Martin DB5
abandoned by James Bond
‘What a funny, dirty little mind!’
I have a friend who says that she has never seen the movie The Thomas Crown Affair. The 1968 film with Steve McQueen and Faye Dunaway was so incredibly cool and laden with style that everyone who wants to be voguish should see it. It has one of the strangest theme songs of all time; The Windmills of Your Mind ~ sort of sung by Noel Harrison.
There was a 1999 remake starring Pierce Brosnan and Rene Russo.
This song has to be in my top 100, if I ever get around to having a top 100.
Please listen without wanting to become a glider pilot, or drive a beach buggy on a beach. Watch the movie without wanting to become a thief.
just a surreal picture
a bit like the movie
So, who do you want to be tomorrow?
my wish is to wake up a better person than when I went to bed
We always want what we think we can’t have ~ that’s just human nature. It’s striving to get what we think we can’t have, to dream the impossible dream, to find new experiences and new loves that makes men and women do things like climb Mt. Everest, invent the wheel, put a man on the moon, and besiege Troy for the love of Helen. And every time ordinary people said they were crazy.
If we become a better person we are not only able to take better care of ourselves, we can also take better care of others, especially the people we have feelings for, especially the one we love the most of all.
When you take care of yourself, you’re a better person for others. When you feel good about yourself, you treat others better. ~ Solange Knowles.
Ergo, the first thing you should want to become is a superior version of yourself. Look after yourself, get healthier, fitter, stronger in body, mind, and spirit ~ get control of your emotions, get out in the fresh air and sunshine, get some exercise, read some good books, listen to some uplifting talks on YouTube….. Not only that, take a good hard look at yourself and be brutally honest; are you looking as good as you could? Hair, manicure, clothes, shoes, is your skin as healthy and glowing as it could be, do you smell nice?
What about your finances? Have you got spare cash at the end of the month, or are you continually broke? Are you in a dead-end job that pays peanuts? Do you actually manage your money, balance your cheque book?
And how are your relationships? Are you still madly in love with your partner, or are you in a dysfunctional relationship? Do you like to see your family regularly, or, like me are you totally estranged? Have your friends all turned to strangers?
You know you need to make some changes and rearrange your whole life, and deep down you really know what it is you need to do ~ so do it. You have had enough lessons from life ~ so use them and unfuck your life. You’d think you’d have made some changes by now, so dump the apathy, and be who who really want to be.
And if you don’t know who you want to be, then find yourself your ideal role model, and become them. It does not even have to be a real person; you may want to be India Jones, James Bond, Achilles, Holly Golightly, Ellen Ripley, or Aphrodite ~ don’t just sit there, do something about it ~ act as if you were that person. You will never become your role model, but along the way you will become a superior version of yourself.
Some say that there are going to be some changes around here ~ tomorrow. And that they are just running around in crazy circles like a rat on a wheel. All I know is I hope we find our way someday soon.
don’t all men just love that kind of discourse with a woman they care about?
most women would rather cry in a jaguar than on a bus
V12 E-Type Jaguar
Jaguar XJ S V-12 Convertible
Series One Land Rover
Caterham 7 de Dion
Caterham 7 with a girl riding shotgun
my other Ford Mustang
a miniature Aston Martin
I’ve owned, rented, or just driven examples of all of the above.
it was Beauty killed the Beast
As it’s Valentine’s weekend, these are the movies I would have lined-up for my best girl to chose from for a feel-good movie night in. Wine, appetisers, a log fire, and perhaps playing on the big-screen TV:
- When Harry Met Sally.
- Sleepless in Seattle.
- Groundhog Day.
- Beakfast At Tiffanys.
- Doctor Zhivago.
- Gone With The Wind.
- Die Hard, (just for Yippee Ki Yay, Mother Fucker).
Missing from my list are; Alien, As Good As It Gets, Beauty And The Beast, Blade Runner, The Blues Brothers, The Devil Wears Prada, Dirty Dancing, Ghost, Gladiator, The Great Escape, King Kong, Lady And The Tramp, The Magnificent Seven, The Maltese Falcon, Pretty Woman, The Princess Bride, Pulp Fiction, Singin’ In The Rain, Sparticus, Star Wars, The Thomas Crown Affair, Titanic, Wall-E and Zulu.
Perhaps not everyone’s glass of Cabernet, but I am open to suggestions.
Some say that you can tell a lot about a guy from his choice of movies. And that if he really loves her he will order take-out. All I know is that for every couple there exists their favourite movie, they just have to find it together.
that scene has got to make every man ponder
believe in love, believe in magic, believe in dreams
Dreaming, I must be dreaming
You have held me in your arms
Magic, it must be your magic
I surrendered to your charms
Dreams, I know I’m dreaming
Or am I really lying next to you
Dreaming, intimate dreaming
In dreams can’t help myself
I’ll fall in love again with you
there’s something about a beautiful witch
true love is as boundless and free as the ocean
Richard Marx, from the album Repeat Offender, which I bought in 1989 ~ jeez…..
This seems to have been written for my current romantic situation. In fact RM wrote this for his wife to be Cynthia, when they were really separated by oceanic distances. Allegedly this song was churned out in 20 minutes.
the ocean isn’t always peaceful