if you don’t feed your dog
don’t be surprised if he’s scrabbling through the trash
younger man with an older women
Forget Maslow’s hierarchy of needs because in this day and age shelter, warmth, water, and food are available to every person living in a western civilisation. What most men want most, what drives almost every man, is the desire for sex, money, and power. Love is something else, and anyone actually searching for love probably has unrealistic expectations of life.
For the average man, the triumvirate of sex, money, and power almost always begins with money. Not that many women want to date / have a fling with / sleep with an average guy who is also flat broke. And, if you’re flat broke it might also mean that you don’t dress well, can’t really afford to hang out in upscale bars, and your car is a junker. Not many women want to have sex in a wreck of a car. So the average guy is caught in a Catch-22 situation, what he really wants to do is hang out in bars and find an inebriated woman to have casual sex with, but before he can do that he needs some significant folding stuff. More than that, power flows from money like water flows downstream, and many women find power an aphrodisiac.
There are but a few ways to get money. One could try gambling, but all gamblers end up dead broke. Stealing it in one way or another is very dangerous ~ all thieves come to a bad end, eventually. More unlikely ways of acquiring a bank-roll are inheriting it, marrying it, becoming a drug dealer, and winning the lottery. Do not hold your breath. The most reliable way to get cash is to work for it ~ that means being very successful in your chosen career, and that means working hard, putting in the hours, and that will keep you out of the bars where you hope to meet an easy lay. The upside to being very successful in your chosen career is that you will also become powerful.
Sex, Money, and Power form a stable equilateral triangle. The average man can’t get a lot of one without also acquiring an abundance of the other two. Or, for the extremely unethical bastard, you could find a plain older woman who happens to have money, marry her, and then entertain yourself by cheating on her, gaslighting her, and stealing from her.
Personally, I happen to know a very cool American woman I can’t meet because of a raft of insurmountable obstacles. But that’s Life for you, and 2 out of 3 ain’t bad.
Of course, 90% of the above also applies to women, (maybe 90%, I’m not a woman so I can’t be certain).
Some say that commitment to just one person is am unachievable dream. And that relationships shouldn’t have rules. All I know is that some people are utterly honest, open, and ethical ~ but most aren’t
a woman sitting at the bar
and drinking alone
is only there for one reason