Expectations vs Reality

When you stop expecting people to be perfect,
then you can like them for who they are.


Believing our expectations causes pain because the expectations often clash with reality ~ with life as it really is, and the future as it is meant to be.  The expectation could be as simple as; I wish I didn’t have to go to the store today’ or the expectation could be powerful, such as ‘after all this I expect her to have sex with me’.  It could be an utterly impossible desire, such as wanting her to exercise hard to have a better body.

Whatever the disconnect is, any time we believe a thought that says Life should be different from the way it is now, then we will really suffer.  Every single time.

Have an expectation that isn’t completely under your own control, an expectation that says; ‘he / she should be different, Life should be different’, and you will get badly hurt.  Take life as it is, live in the moment, and don’t ever try to change another person, and most likely you won’t be hurt ~ or not so badly.  Even you cannot control the cosmos.

Some of the time we cannot even control our own thoughts, which have a tendency to drift off into fantastical flights of fancy, building castles in the clouds.  Most of the time we can’t control our own bodies; we get sick, we gain weight, we start looking older…..  What will happen will happen whether we like it or not ~ sometimes it’s best to pretend to like what’s happening, even if you secretly hate it.  Remember the adage ‘fake it to make it’.

If you don’t like something change it.  If you can’t change it, change your attitude.  ~  Maya Angelou.

Never focus so hard on what you want that you ignore what you already have.  Never believe that you can change a woman, because you can’t.  And, if you can’t live with what you have, then just walk away.  You certainly can never change her past.

Some say that men are quick to leave a relationship.  And that they almost always return.  All I know is that if you leave her, you should never, ever look back.


jack collier


never date an alcoholic woman

it will not end well


15 responses

  1. i have a theory its this… why would anyone read the same book when it is over? the only way you would do this is if the book was legendary

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sweetheart, some books are worth reading more than once, but an ‘ex’ is never worth dating again. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Beautifully written post, I agree never look back if you’re ready to leave

    Liked by 1 person

    1. And, never, ever date an ‘ex’. ❤😎

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Sometimes expectations will teach you to understand and perhaps make you realise that it’s okay…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I try very hard not to have unrealistic expectations, it doesn’ t always work. 😈

      Liked by 1 person

  4. You are right! Expectations ruin relationships. But it is hard to have zero expectations.


    1. We all have expectations, it’s unreasonable expectations that hurt everyone concerned ❤❤❤


  5. Thanks for this very insightful and timely post.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are most welcome 💞😎

      Liked by 1 person

  6. The thing about dating an alcoholic is at some point you think the light will come on,and they will stop drinking. Wishful thinking, fools we are.Fools we are

    Liked by 1 person

    1. A real alcoholic almost never stops drinking ~ unless a miracle happens. 😎❤


  7. Acceptance is a reality. The expectation is a dream.

    Liked by 2 people

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