Feeling very ill

Never let your head hang down.  Never give up and let your soul grieve.  Find another way.  And don’t pray when it rains if you don’t pray when the sun shines.

A good friend of mine has suggested that I may have bipolar disorder, and not borderline personality disorder.

I do have very severe mood swings, that range from euphoria, to very bad temper, to suicidal depression.  But, one can get severe mood swings with both bipolar disorder, and borderline personality disorder.

All I know is that my behaviour over the last week had been disgraceful, and right now I have become seriously depressed.

Today I can begin thinking about making changes in my life and my responsibilities.  I can ask for help from my friends, and do some rearranging so that no day is completely overwhelming.

All I hope is that I don’t turn into Mr. Hyde again.

Jack Collier




Turning into Mr. Hyde is the very worst thing that can happen to me.

21 responses

  1. […] today, but that conversation with my friend, about me writing posts entitled; Worrying About Life, Feeling very ill, and I have my problems, has put me right back to square […]


  2. Hyde is hiding inside us, following us, watching us , to attack when we are sad or weak. Each one has one, sometimes we let others view our Hyde publicly. It’s a constant fight, between Hyde and me 🙂
    I turn into Hyde but no one sees and am back to me..


    1. When I turn into Mr. Hyde it’s all too obvious ~ the whole world knows. ❤ ❤ ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I am so sorry to hear and I hope things are starting to look up, even just a little at the time xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Petra. Your kind thoughts help make all things better. ❤ ❤ ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m so sorry you are going through this Jack! Keep those friends close!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. However you move forward, do it mindfully. You can break the cycle!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Robynbird ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Sending more healing energy, Jack!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Magickmermaid. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Sending you comfort Jack and I hope you have a good psychiatrist and therapist to help you. Much love💖

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I send you a hug of comfort.
    Bipolar or any form of severe depression is destructive, and difficult to comprehend by those that don’t get it.

    Try taking some vitamin D3 tablets Jack. You can buy it at Saintsbury’s (90 twenty five microgram tablets) for £2.

    Take fifty micrograms a day (2 tablets) for a couple of weeks and see if it makes a difference.

    Traditionally, depression has been treated with ultraviolet therapy. But some people cannot make enough D3 even if they go in the sunshine every day.

    As a Vegan, I have followed the advice of a Vegan doctor… He suggests that the only supplements needed are B12 and Vitamin D3.

    Foods are largely supplemented with D3 or D2(not as usable by the body), milk for example.

    Dear Jack, I think this one little thing (taking D3) may help you more than all the meditation, consultation and commiseration in the world. Give it a try!❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. PS- give yourself a few weeks on the vit D3… It isn’t instantaneous building up a missing nutrient.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you, I will try that. ❤


        1. I started taking vitamin D3 a couple of days ago.
          And today, I feel pretty damn good.

          Liked by 1 person

          1. It can actually take a while before your levels are up to par, but glad you feel better.❤


  9. Sadly I’m there with ya. My BPD symptoms kicked my ass these past few days and it’s getting worse. The depression & self destruction is now here. Wish you the best…

    Liked by 2 people

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