For now we see through a glass, darkly.
Life is a matter of contrasts and changes. Perhaps one cannot truly know joy and pleasure, unless we have also known suffering and pain. Perhaps one cannot set out to walk the warrior’s path without first knowing what it is like to hit a rock bottom. And, I believe that one cannot realise what truth is without having been deceived and lied to.
I know that to achieve enlightenment we first have to be sorely tested by crushing disillusionment and the temptations of listening to our darkest inner demons. It seems that Life is all about balance; light and dark, good and bad, yin and yang, male and female, disillusionment and enlightenment…
The real meaning of enlightenment is to gaze with undimmed eyes on all darkness. – Nikos Kazantzakis
Without balance I was a one-sided person, the man in the mirror, a creature ruled by my inner demons and character defects. I was angry, disillusioned, jealous, judgemental, and filled with negativity. I was both unpleasant and unkind. And, of course, I was unhappy.
Some things have changed. I have admitted my faults and confessed to my wrongs. I was able to be contrite and penitent. Most importantly, I was willing to recover from the deep psychological and spiritual illnesses that beset me.
Over the last few days I have been feeling much better. Over the past few days I have been able both to pray and meditate. And, over the past few days I have begun to know an inner peace.
Enlightenment means to know and practice acceptance, kindness, open-mindedness, understanding, and wisdom. Enlightenment means redemption.
From my small understanding of life, quantum mechanics, relativity, and spirituality, l firmly believe in the interconnectedness of all things. I firmly believe that disillusionment and enlightenment are as interconnected as night and day. I firmly believe that one cannot truly know enlightenment unless one has first known the misery of disillusionment.
Trust me, I have known the misery of disillusionment, and now I am walking the warrior’s path towards true enlightenment.