It’s Friday, so this should be a food post, but there are some reasons it isn’t, not least that I have a stinking cold, and the last thing I want to think about is food.
In my fevered dreams I have been imagining my current relationship’s doom. It’s not good. The imaginings lead to introspection. So, right now, I can write about Balancing The Inner Man, coping with the male romancer, the lover, the cool guy.
Men should live in balance between work, rest, friends, family, responsibilities, and recreation. Men should live in balance between love and disregard. Men should live within the maxim of a healthy mind in a healthy body. Men should be aware of the balance between mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual health. Most importantly, all men should be aware of becoming unbalanced because of a too deep an attraction to a woman.
Only addiction can unbalance a real man, and loving a woman is a form of addiction.
Men, this man at least, is aggressive, jealous, prideful, protective, and vulnerable. Men have both an inner masculine being and an inner feminine side. In a truly mature man these things should be in balance, with the emphasis being on masculinity. But, a superior man will let go of the caveman mentality, and become accepting, emotionally expressive, open-minded, and understanding.
If you are a woman this seems self-evident, but let me tell you, as a man, these ‘feminine’ character traits are
fucking beyond ordinarily difficult. And an attraction to a woman makes it much harder for a mature and superior man to behave in a balanced and gentlemanly manner.
Understanding and accepting her completely needs 100% of the goodness and acceptance a man can offer. People do what they did, and a leopard never changes its spots. Being good with her past is almost impossible. Being good with her family needs just as much emotional strength as living with her past. And, being cool with her friends is often a Herculean task.
However, there are only two choices in a relationship, care for her, or walk away. Sometimes deciding to walk away is more painful than staying in a bad relationship. Sometimes walking away is what we should do.
Friendships and sexual attraction are based on differences. There can be no passion without inner masculinity, and men are not normally attracted to women who have no deep feminine qualities. A truly feminine woman will have qualities that a superior man finds both endearing and difficult to live with.
But, if you want her, you will accept her completely. A superior man can only care for one woman, and to do otherwise is a lie. Screwing around is the mark of a pathetic being, not a balanced and superior man.
The Cosmos made life difficult for a reason, for without difficulties how do we develop, grow, and evolve?
When it comes down to it, it’s all about balance.