Sorry Is Never Enough

The English are continually apologising, saying ‘sorry’ to one another…  Accidentally bump into someone, step on their toes, say sorry.  If someone accidentally bumps into you, also say sorry.  More often than not both people in some kind of unintended contact will say sorry.  ‘I’m sorry I trod on your toe…’  ‘I’m sorry it’s raining outside…’  ‘I’m sorry that 96 people died because of our criminal incompetence…’

Oh it seems to me, that sorry seems to be the hardest word.  ~ Elton John

You know what?  It’s pointless.  Sorry is not the hardest word.  Saying sorry is easy.  Saying sorry doesn’t make things better.  Even being sorry for the wrongs you’ve done doesn’t make things better.  All a mere apology does is show that you are not motivated enough, not strong enough, not man enough, to actually make things better.  An apology by itself is a weak and meaningless thing.


If you have done wrong, and you are truly sorry for the wrongs you have done, don’t just say sorry, do something about it.  A real man tries to right the wrongs he has done, no matter what it costs him.  Even if it results in his own destruction, a man should atone for his sins and make things right.

It is no mistake that 12 step recovery programmes use these words;

8.  Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9.  Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

It turns out that I need to atone for some wrongs I have done.  I need to make my amends.  I need to put things right, quietly, without making a fuss, when the time is right and the opportunities come my way.

We all make mistakes.  Just saying sorry is never going to be enough to restore true balance in this life.




2 responses

  1. This is also why the Act of Contrition contains a third caveat to apologizing and asking for forgiveness along with the firm resolve (with the help of the offended’s good graces): 1) “to confess my sin” (owning it), 2) “to do penance” (to make up for the wrong somehow), and 3) “to amend my life” (change my ways). If Bill W. wasn’t a Catholic, I’d be surprised!


  2. Saying sorry might be easy for some, but it’s also good manners. If you’re wrong – own up to it. But, you are right when you say that we should do more.


Please Leave a Reply or Ask Me Anything you like.

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: