Sensitive Compassionate Humanity

Sometimes making a success of my relationships is like trying to turn back the tide.

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I have character defects, faults and flaws.  I can be viciously unkind.  Either by nature or due to my upbringing I tend towards being; antisocial, critical, egotistical, impatient, judgemental, opinionated, prideful, reckless, sarcastic, and uncharitable.  If you ask my Lady, she will like as not tell you there are a lot more imperfections and shortcomings about my psyche.

Two important things I am not are that I am neither tolerant nor understanding of others, up to and including my closest friend.  This tends to make for an angry and uncomfortable relationship, which would br destined to end sooner rather than later, and end very badly for all concerned.  The fall-out and collateral damage would not be pretty.

After much thought, meditation and soul-searching I therefore resolved to embark upon a major work of self-improvement.  As it goes, I have already been working on 3 important things for a while; being fit and active, eating a good diet, and really, really giving up the booze.  On the premise that Rome wasn’t built in a day, I am committed to working on just one more important amelioration of my persona, ego, super ego, and id.

Make the most of yourself…….  for that is all there is of you. ~ Ralf Waldo Emerson

This man will become more tolerant of others and much more understanding of my closest friend.  That’s not going to be so easy.  Self-improvement is something only the better among us even attempt with any determination.  Often we involve life-coaches, psychologists, psychiatrists, support groups, sponsors, partners, (that’s a usually a mistake), religion, inspirational books, videos….

Personally, I will be treading this hard path with the help of my ‘higher power’ ~ who just happens to be the embodiment of everything feminine.  The male part of me has so many negative macho traits that I need all the nurturing feminine help I can get.

I shall keep you appraised of my progress to becoming a better man.

After this, turning back the tide will be easy.

P1020368Pictures by jack collier

jackcollier7@talktalk.net

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10 responses

  1. Bravo, you! Being self aware is at least half the battle.
    Remember Yoda’s words: Do or do not. There is no try.
    You’re ‘doing’ it simply because you’ve made the decision to make effort. Your friend won’t be the only one to benefit. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Saying; ‘I am trying to…..’ doesn’t work for me. Thank you for your presence.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. You take on great personal challenges. I think those are the ones worth going for. Go big or go home, right? Only thing is, I laughed when you said turning back the tide will be easy after this. My experience is that I thought the same thing and none of it is easy. Worth it? I can still say, “Yes, it is worth it for sure”. It’s not easy at all. I think you just have to wear a new path down and tread lightly with perseverance and self forgiveness. That’s my experience and you could very well have a much easier time. I hope it’s easy for you. A happier man in the world is a good thing. xo, Jayne

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    1. The commitment to change, and planting my feet firmly on the path, has already allowed me to be a happier version of who I am. Thank you Jayne.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I get impatient with my own ability to change but then I realize how long it took to be as I am so I cut myself a little bit of slack. It does take time to truly change. It sounds like you’ll be perfectly fine.

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  3. Rome wasn’t built in a day . Even if you go one step forward and 6 back , time scale of getting where your going in life not important. Getting there that counts with head held high. I’m sure what ever your inner self looking for , you find it one day. Body and inner spirit become one again.
    Sure all your friends will help you on the path of life.

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    1. That you for your support and kind words.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I don’t think you have as far to go as you think. I just have a sense about you. It could just be my allergies, but I don’t think so. 😘

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I have a good feeling about you too ~ and I don’t have allergies.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You think you like my feeling now, you should see what happens when I can really feel you! 😀

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