I you’re not offending someone, you’re not doing your job.
Yesterday evening I started to write a post for today ~ or rather I began 3 different posts, and scrapped all of them. All three of those posts would have offended some of the people who follow my blog, and some of my close friends, so I junked all of those questionable posts.
I believe in absolute freedom of expression. Everyone has a right to be offended. ~ Taslima Nasrin
If you have followed my blog for any length of time you will know that I don’t shy away from offending some people, but the people I’m happy to offend deserve whatever they get, and more. I have no problem being offensive to Bankers, Politicians, Government Officials ~ and on Monday of this week I was offensive toward the disgusting sex-pests, perverts, paedophiles, and rapists who work for some ‘Big Charities’ such as Oxfam.
I’m not happy to offend the innocent who just happen to do, (or have done), some things I profoundly disagree with. That would be cruel, hurtful, hypocritical, mendacious, and vicious of me.
I try to practice ‘mindfulness’ every time I encounter a stressful feeling or negative emotion, of I am challenged by my own anger. Mindfulness grounds me in the present and stops me obsessing about the past. I can look at my feelings as though I am an uninvolved observer, rather than being at the centre of the maelstrom. That way I can act and react in a balanced and thoughtful way.
So, instead of what I intended to write about, which in each of the three cases would have been stressful, challenging, negative, and emotive ~ I’m going to tell you how I came to the decision that writing about this stuff would have been a bad idea.
These days I try to live a kind, mindful, self-aware, and spiritual existence ~ bringing inner peace and happiness to myself and those around me. Offending innocent people for no good reason than my own instant gratification is not living an ethical and spiritual existence.
I try to be accepting, understanding, and supportive to those around me. I do my best to live a mindful life. I work very hard at walking the warrior’s path to ultimate truth and inner peace. I profoundly believe that as I give to the world, so I shall receive in return.
Ergo, publishing a blog which I knew would upset and hurt some people, which would make them think that I was actually attacking them, was not who I am trying to be today. In any event, I am not perfect within myself.
When you are offended at any person’s fault, turn to yourself and study our own failings. Then you will forget your anger. ~ Epictetus
I want to make good changes in my relationships, my behaviours, habits, and routines ~ attacking someone, or a group of people, is neither good nor positive. So, I decided that I just wasn’t going to do it.
And you know what? I feel better for not publishing any of those three negative, emotive, and judgmental posts.
The posts I had half written, and then trashed were about Borderline Personality Disorder, casual sex with strangers, and the medicinal use of marijuana.
Charity compelled is simply a polite word for slavery.
Big Charities, often known as the Third Sector, disgust and appall me.
Personally, I only ever donate to one charity, and that is my local hospice. Under no circumstances would I ever donate to ‘Big Charity’ ~ organisations such as the disgraced Oxfam, the RSPB, the RSPCA, Save the Children, Wellcome Trust, World Food Programme, World Vision.
I’m not a fan of giving to charities. I have a few I support but the overhead and inefficiencies really bother me. Instead I pay people’s bills and help solve problems. ~ Mark Cuban
Previously the reason I never gave to charities other than my local hospice was my disgust at how much the bosses of the big charities paid themselves ~ the average, (mean), pay for executives in the top 100 UK charities was £255,000 pounds a year in 2017, ($350,000). Fourteen of the top 100 charities paid their highest earners more than £300,000 a year ~ and those huge pay deals come straight out of the money that is supposed to go to good causes. That is obscene.
The highest paid charities bosses in England all work for charitable healthcare trusts, with the top people at the London Clinic, Nuffield Health, and St. Andrews Healthcare all earning over £750,000 a year, ($1,050,000).
It’s even worse in the USA with the boss of the Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center being paid $6,700,003 in 2016. The boss of the National Rifle Association, (which has charitable status), was paid $1,422,339 in 2016 ~ the NRA like AR-15 assault rifles such as the type used to kill 17 people in a Florida High School recently.
Disproportionate salaries risk bringing charitable organisations and the wider charitable world into disrepute. ~ William Shawcross, Chairman of the Charity Commission.
And now there is another reason I won’t give to charities other than my local hospice ~ the big aid charities are discovered to be the natural home and hunting ground for sex-pests, perverts, paedophiles and rapists.
From Africa, to the Caribbean, end even in thrift stores in the United Kingdom, there has been a continual flood of disturbing news of sex abuse, some of it of the worst kind imaginable, with under-age girls and boys being forced to trade their bodies for food by aid workers. Desperate teen prostitutes were paid in rice to have sex with groups of Oxfam workers at drunken orgies in Haiti. This is far beyond disgusting.
Even the respected Archbishop Desmond Tutu has resigned as an ambassador for Oxfam ~ the worst hit of the sex-scandal charities, for now.
You would think their would be some contrition at the highest levels in Oxfam, but NO there isn’t. Oxfam still will not release the names of the guilty aid workers. The disingenuous Mark Goldring, the charity’s chief executive, has said that; ‘the issue had been blown out of all proportion…’ He claimed that critics were ‘gunning’ for the charity. And, ‘it’s not like we murdered babies in their cots…’ This sanctimonious man sickens me.
All of a sudden we’ve got two former ministers calling for my resignation. What I felt really clearly is many people haven’t wanted to listen to explanations. ~ Mark Goldring.
How do you explain away child sex abuse and rape?
The UK government was giving some £32 million of taxpayers money to Oxfam annually ~ this funding has been suspended. Many right-thinking people think that it should be stopped altogether, permanently.
I will never give a penny-piece to any charity than my cash-poor local hospice. Unfortunately, the UK Government’s Department for International Development currently squanders £13.4 billion a year on ill-judged funding to organisations like Oxfam and the disgraced UN. I have no choice in where the government spends the money I pay in taxes.
That too is disgusting.
Nothing to do with any of this makes me feel proud to be British.
La mode se démodé, le style monochromatique, jamais.
Noir Rouge à Lèvres Fumer
une garce est la contraire d’une salope,
et elle fume pour la prouver.
No person is free who is not master of themselves.
Self-discipline and self-control aren’t easy ~ these admirable character traits are not something we are born with, and usually most people don’t really develop self-discipline and self-control until they are well into adulthood. Some sad people never learn any real self-discipline and self-control at all. They are doomed to live meaningless, unfulfilled, unhappy, and unenlightened existences.
The exercise of self-discipline and self-control is difficult and complicated, needing willpower, flexibility, and judgement. To live fully rewarding lives we must continually be completely honest with ourselves, yet at times withhold the whole truth from others. To be free of disappointment, pain, and suffering we must assume total responsibility for ourselves and our own actions. It’s no good breaking our abstinence from alcohol or cigarettes just because some other people seem to having a good time smoking and drinking. That is just giving the power to control our lives to others whose own judgement is very suspect.
We must also have the self-discipline and self-control to reject responsibility that is not truly ours. I am not my brother’s keeper, nor are you responsible for what your sister does with her life.
True self-discipline and real self-control means being organised and efficient, living wisely, and living in balance and harmony with yourself and the Cosmos.
A key part of this is the ability to delay gratification ~ don’t always stop at the pub on the way home from work, don’t always get angry when questioned, and don’t always eat that last sandwich even when you are not hungry. Keep an eye on the future, think about what your actions are going to mean tomorrow, next week, next year. Do you want to be an angry and overweight alcoholic? Well, by the sound of it that’s where you’ll be heading if you don’t learn some self-discipline and self-control.
Let hunger sharpen your awareness. Abstain liquor and frivolous recreation, which dull the mind and weaken the body. ~ Laura Joh Rowland.
It’s all about replacing bad and self-destructive habits with good habits that will enhance your life in the longer term. Instead of stopping off at the pub on the way home from work, three or four times a week, go to the gym instead. You won’t get the immediate buzz of getting drunk, but you will get the long-term buzz of being a fitter, healthier, much better person.
Either I’m lucky, or I have a lot of willpower, because I seem to have more than my share of self-discipline and self-control ~ (and even I self-destruct from time to time). I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t pick up cheap women in bars for meaningless sex. I’m fit and healthy, I walk at least 5 miles every day, exercise, and I do yoga. My weight is right where it should be, my blood work is excellent, and my heart is strong. I don’t go to work at all, and yet I’m wealthy enough to do what I like when I like.
And nobody has ever given me one damn thing. Everything I have I have earned for myself through hard work, self-discipline, and self-control.
The answer is easy. Stop pissing your life away like a fool, and start really living instead. Replace your bad and self-destructive habits with good habits that will enhance your life in the longer term.
If I can do it, anyone can.
What I seek is under a spell so only the worthy can find it.
There is a button inside my psyche, its marked Self-Destruct ~ do not press
I press buttons just to find out what they do, it’s part of who I am. Sometimes the little things I do create a huge and unholy mess on the scale of the Titanic disaster. Sometimes I need someone to save me from myself.
There are some things I’m searching for, and failure to make progress in any one of these quests can lead me to pressing the Self-Destruct button ~ usually with painfully disastrous results. The snag is, the things I’m searching for aren’t easy to find. But then, nothing worthwhile is ever easy, and sometimes I’m not even certain what it is I am seeking…
A deeper, enhanced, more emotional, more meaningfully spiritual, enlightened reality ~ connected not just to my id, but to my entire body, mind, and soul.
Relationships that are mutually supportive and in harmony, and not always on the verge of self-destruction. A strong, trusting, loving, liberated, intimate relationship with someone I really care for and who cares for me in return.
Freedom from my black or white, yes / no thinking. In relationships I have a strong tendency to want it all, or nothing at all. My ethics, morals, and mores are painfully strict and old-fashioned.
Self without cognitive dissonance, anger, insecurity, intolerance, jealousy, or fear of abandonment. A self that is enlightened, accepting of all, and understanding of all.
Truth that is not brutal, and is neither self-serving, nor hiding behind lies of omission and half-truths.
A healthy mind in a healthy body. Continually seeking to improve my physical, mental, psychological, and spiritual fitness.
Patience, acceptance, tolerance, understanding, and a willingness to compromise ~ all of which I have little if any at all.
When you want to hurry something, that means you no longer care about it and want to get on to other things. ~ Robert M. Pirsig
I do too much, give me an acorn and before you know where you are you will be up to your ass in oak trees. I fight the alligators instead of remembering that I’m supposed to be draining the swamp. My dress sense is preppy, rather than relaxed, or trendy, or fashionable. I tend to give solutions, rather than just quietly listening to the problem. My desires, emotions, and passions run very strong and very deep.
Today is Ash Wednesday, the beginning of Lent. This lenten season I am giving up the right to be a typical self-indulgent male, which includes dealing with some, or all, of the above ~ especially impatience.
Please Do Not Press This Button Again
with thanks to my Goddess
Chaos is the Cosmos telling you that you are forever lost.
Turmoil. Mind like a lost gypsy cab driving through a chaotic concrete jungle.
Dystopia. Disembarking, it’s so dark and it’s so quiet in the ruins, grey and burned black broken like bad teeth .
Lost. Then I’m walking on wet cobbled stones, just a bum with threadbare dirty clothes, down at the heel shoes, a body that’s all skin and bones.
Doom. The final dark gloom of a Dead Man Walking to nowhere and forever.
Despair. Now all the good has gone from my life ~ what is joy, what is elation?
Dishonour. I want you all to know that once I was proud, once I was a man and once I meant something. But that’s not now. That’s not now.
Terror. I need to wake up. I need to go home. I need to find friendship again.
Loneliness. I have no love, only blackness in my heart, my Goddess has gone.
Nightmare. But, bad memories, just like the seas, live on.
I love the moon too much to be afraid of the night.
now is the time for me to set myself to rights,
it’s time to stop bemoaning my evil plight,
come out of the dark shadows into the light,
moonlight is better than the blackest of nights,
and that’s where I’ve been, cowering in fright.
There is no point in waiting until tomorrow, there is no mileage in procrastination, and mañana isn’t even English. I need to take action this day.
There have been things in my life I have not understood, or have chosen not to understand, or have chosen to ignore ~ and these things are now coming out of the darkness of my deep subconscious into the light of my conscious awareness.
Recently it has all been a bit intense, and at times I’ve struggled through cognitive dissonance, not knowing who I am, or what I want from Life. But I have been shocked from complacency by both my friend and my Goddess. Today, I am blessed with a powerful and strange energy which has allowed me to make a brutally honest assessment of myself.
This intense, powerful, strange energy is allowing me to make changes within myself I have not previously had the power to achieve.
Yet, I know that any change I attempt to make from within my personality, my id, and my ego, should be for the greater good or it will never work. I have had far too much help to be selfish and make changes that will only benefit myself. But, as I improve mine own self, it will reflect in every aspect of my world and my life.
As I give to the world, so I shall receive in return.
As I walk from the darkness into the moonlight, my life and my world will change for the better. I have realised that to cower in fear in the darkness is to stray from the true warrior’s path. I thank my friend and my Goddess for that new awareness.
True Serenity is knowing Peace amid the Storm.
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.