Wanted ~ Female CoWriter



I have come to realise that I need a new collaborator for this blog and the books I am working on.  What I need is a strong, opinionated, forthright, outspoken, sophisticated, well groomed, mature woman to tell me where I am totally wrong.  A woman who can tell me that I am an idiot.

I would prefer to work with a woman who knows how to wear a little black dress.

If you are interested in writing with me, please email JackCollier7@talktalk.net  or add your interest to the comments area on any of my pages.

There is a 50% share of any money we make.

There will also be the usual gifts a man bestows on an attractive woman.


not me

Jack Collier

p.s. I do not smoke or drink, and I am always well dressed and groomed.  For some reason I know I need to colaborate with a woman who smokes cigarettes and drinks hard booze.

pps. I have one candidate,who is accepted, another would be nice


More like me.

Cyber Love Affairs


The internet is full of weird stuff.  One particular area that may attract the more mature cognoscenti is that odd four letter acronym MILF.  I admit that I am so badly informed that I had to look this up, it means a sexually attractive older woman, typically one who has children.  This definition does not explain the acronym at all.  Deeper digging gives; Mother I’d Like to Fool around with.  (Actually what the F stands for is the F word.)  For a man of my more mature years there is also GILF, although I really can’t tell the difference.



If you have read my About page then you will know that I am a man of the world, or so I thought until I came across the world of internet affairs.  It seems that there is an entire cybersex-dating world, espescially concerning that mysterious character ~ the MILF/ GILF

The theory is this, (and there are more acronyms than you can shake a stick at), MILFs want NSA sex.

If you enter this dark world there are a lot of other mysterious terms you will need to learn; cowgirl, shaped, doggy…

There are several levels to this weird world, free sex chat, paid sex chat, get laid tonight, webcam, relationships, dogging…  For my own sanity I am pleased to say that dogging isn’t what it sounds like.  Dogging is fucking or being a voyeur in a public place.

I may have been guilty of sex, in a car, in a public car park, but  I wouldn’t have anyone watching.  On the other hand there is a whole industry devoted to voyeurism.  If you want to be a player, or a voyeur, there are people waiting to accomodate you.

Personally, I have never done the voyeurism thing, but there is one woman I would try it with ~ every cool guy knows at least one women like that.

The bottom level of cybersex is free sex chat.  Supposedly you can be connected to a woman who has nothing better to do than talk dirty to you.  Good luck with that one Sunshine.

Then there is paid sex chat.  Call a number that will cost you anything up to $2 a minute and you can listen to a bored houswife saying the F and C words as many times as you like while you do what you do best.

There are more dating websites than an angry man can shake a stick at.  Beware, if you sign up to one of these sites, your details will be promulgated to more dating websites than you knew were even possible.  Personally, I do not want to be connected to a shemale or a guy who wants to watch while I screw his wife.  (Thinking about it…  No.)

woman-masturbatesThen we move on to sex cams.  Women, guys, and couples will pretty much do what you want as long as your credit card is picking up the hefty tab.

You may also meet someone online.  This is the very worst scenario of all.

Obviously if you meet someone online, you know nothing at all about them, other than what they tell you.  Even if you have access to their twitter feed, Facebook pages, personal website ~ you still know nothing about them.

The hot blonde you are chatting with, and makes slobbering sounds as she masturbates, may turn out to be some sweaty, fat, bored teamster who likes being a woman on-line.

This is rule one of cyber sex.  Go no deeper than whatever appears on your screen.  As long as you are happy with what you see, it matters not one iota what is on the other keyboard.  Personally, if the screen says she a hot blonde MILF who wants to go down on me, then I’m happy to go with that.  Cybersex requires suspension of disbelief in the same way reading a comic book needs one to believe that a man can really fly.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAGet past the relationship you have on the  screen at your own risk.

You have no idea what psychotic problems she / he is bringing to the party.

But, if she has 7,000 twitter followers, you have to ask yourself; Why?

Guys espescially do not follow women on anything, Twitter included, to see their thoughts on the nature of the Cosmos.  Guys follow women on twitter for disgusting filth.  Guys follow women on-line for sex.  Women with several thousand followers deliver on-line filth of the most sexual nature imaginable.

Some women do have this thing that they feel it’s all right to be a whore on-line, because it’s not really real.

I can almost go with that.  Actually… no I can’t.  If she is a whore on-line, then she is a whore ~ period.

The problem arises when this on-line whore strikes up a real relationship with you, or you with her.


not a pussy shot

That’s when you find out that your angel is not only the centrefold, she has more on-line lovers than you can count.

I did that one, started what I thought was a meaningful relationship, only to discover that my Love Goddess was having the same sort of chats with all of her 7,076 followers.  And you really would not want to know which of her thousands of followers she was having on-line sex with.

Turned out that it got worse.  She had a website that was so pornographic that it was blocked, as far as I was concerned.

What you will discover if you have a relationship based on the internet, is that whatever bad stuff has been going on will be hidden from you until it smacks you in the face.

The good news is that anything that is on the internet is in the public domain, so should you feel vicious, you can send her pornographic material to her employers, or just broadcast her tits all over the web.

Of course, that would be the action of a cad.

The picture above can still be found all over the web, complete with nicely shaved lips, but I seem to have a little decency left.

The woman in the tits and pussy shot is a nice girl, but she has the maturity of an infant.  Every guy should love a whore, at least once.  It’s practically a rule.

The message is:

tits on twitter

Pure White Light Disassembled



the magic miracle of a double rainbow

Pure White Light Disassembled


Violet, indigo, blue, green, yellow, orange, red

Can’t go to school

staying home in bed


Every Good Boy Deserves Favour

It’s chicken pox

and I have a fever


Mensa, mensae, mensae, mensam…,

I must be ill

Mom called me ‘poorly lamb’


The square on the hypotenuse…,

Doctor’s coming soon

I hope for happy news

It’s nice outside today

I want to go and play


Je suis, vous etes, il est, elle est, ils sont…,

Mom’s wise to that

back door is locked


Amo, amas, amat, amamus, amatis, amant

So I want to go and play

and Mom says I can’t

Oh well, I’ll just stay here and chant


I hate conjugating Latin verbs


Words and picture by Jack Collier




clippers, scattered like butterflies




Scattered like butterflies

nursery blue summer skies

reflected and mirrored

haze shimmered and silvered

to the send of the sea they ride

giddy against a tender tide

but ignoring our dreams

our plans and fantastical schemes

the sails have a life of their own.


It seems we can’t have it all

I’m no Bogey

and, sadly, you’re no Bacall


This is not Key Largo

words by jack collier












I am out of this place.

Jack Collier, aka Gordon Burrows

Women, Stress, Suffering and Spirituality




This message is the essence of The Four Noble Truths.


the stress of coping with too much of the wrong problem

Back in the day I had a stressful career.  If you read my About page you will get some idea of what I mean.  The stress I was under caused me a few problems; excessive drinking, heart problems, weight problems, forgetfulness, irritability, a vicious temper, a poor moral compass, (I had a few affairs), anxiety and clinical depression.  Eventually I was admitted to the Priory Clinic.  The eight weeks I spent in there were the best seven weeks of my life ~ (the first three days I was in there I sat in the dark and wouldn’t speak with anyone).

Chronic anxiety is a state more undesirable than any other, and we will try almost any maneuver to eliminate it.  Modern man is living in anxious anticipation of destruction.  Such anxiety can easily be eliminated by self-destruction.  As a German saying puts it: Better an end with terror than a terror without end. ~ Robert E. Neale, The Art of Dying

Stress in psychological terms is the result of being under too much mental, emotional, and spiritual pressure.  Too much stress is unpleasant, it can also lead to the serious psychological problems of anxiety and depression.  Too much stress can kill people.  If you are struggling with stress, feeling as though you can’t handle daily life, then you urgently need to find a way to cope.  There is no use in going on struggling with stress.  The way I eventually dealt with my own stress problems was to quit my vastly overpaid job in Banking Consultancy, and buy a trailer park instead.  Turned out that had a little stress attached to it ~ and at the time I could not deal with stress in any way, shape or form.  I escaped that stress by becoming an alcoholic bum for a while.  You can take it from me that being an alcoholic bum is not the best of lifestyle choices.



You can have a hangover from other things than alcohol.  I had one from women. ~ Raymond Chandler

Stress produces strong Physical Symptoms.  In my experience some of the most common signs of extreme stress don’t always appear on the medical websites.  I have seen extreme stress in myself and in my co-workers and clients.  Almost always what I saw was;

Stress affects everyone, but there is strong evidence that stress is having a dramatic effect on women.  Women don’t know when they are well off.

tits on twitter

they will say that it’s OK

According to the British Office for National Statistics, women are not living as long as they used to.  The stress at work, and the related problems of smoking and drinking too much, are taking an ever increasing toll on their health.  It seems that in 1963 men were twice as likely to die early than women  In 2013 the preponderance of early death in men over women fell to one and a half times.  The life expectancy gap, (how many more years do women live more than men), fell from six years to less than four.

Life is 10 percent what you experience and 90 percent how you respond to it. ~ Dorothy M. Neddermeyer.

As mentioned above, there are some clear signs of stress in changes to our our daily habits.  Smoking, drinking and drug use are not only clear indicators that you are under stress, they will also take years off your life.  Smoking 20 cigarettes a day will take ten years off your life.  A practicing alcoholic will have their life cut short by 23 years.  Chronic cocaine users will lose 34 years of their life.  Allegedly, every cigarette you smoke will take 13.8 minutes off your life, while a couple of drinks will reduce your life expectancy by 6.6 hours. (source http://www.treatment4addiction.com/ ).


at least it’s just a bottle

Women who have given up the domestic lifestyle enjoyed by their mothers and grandmothers are facing the same pressures on life expectancy as men.  Higher premature death rates among women are most marked in the age group 55 to 69.  Stress is a killer and so are the things people do to cope with stress; smoking, drinking, and drug abuse.

It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.  Hans Selye

Increases in women entering the labour force over the last 50 years are considered to have had an adverse impact on the stress they feel, their smoking and drinking habits, all leading to changes in the health of women. ~ The Office for National Statistics.


drinking and smoking are very bad for women

If you are unable to cope with the stress you are under, or feel that you are under, some nasty things happen to you, and this is called distress.  As well as smoking too much and drinking to much there are both emotional and physical symptoms.  Emotional symptoms can start with avoiding certain people, places, and situations.  Sufferers will also have low self-esteem, severe mood swings, and a feeling of impending doom.  Physical symptoms will range from Angina, a loss of sexual appetite to chest pains, panic attacks, insomnia, excessive sweating, headaches, suicide attempts, colitis, stuttering, right through the alphabet to vomiting.  If this carries on over a period of time, then the victim of stress will come to know what real suffering is.

When you have suffered a great deal in life, each additional pain is both unbearable and trifling. ~ Yann Martel, from Life of Pi.


yours for less than you’d think

If you visit your doctor, complaining about stress, then he / she will most likely reach for the prescription pad.  Most likely you will be given one of the various versions of Prozac.  Or, you could be given a benzodiazepine ~ these things are highly addictive, can make you feel suicidal, and come with well over 100 known side effects, personally I wouldn’t take them for more than a week.  Medication isn’t much help when dealing with stress and mental suffering.

What does help are lifestyle changes.  Date a tart.  Take a little exercise in the fresh air ~ go for a walk.  Stop drinking and smoking too much.  Stay well away from street drugs, marijuana is of no help whatsoever.  Make certain that you eat healthily.  Try and sleep at night ~ you may need to learn a little yoga, tai chi, and how to meditate.  If you belive in any form of higher power, then try prayer.  Learn how to relax with breathing exercises.  Stop letting others manage your time ~ make time for youself for a change.  See a therapist.  Write to-do lists for yourself.  Learn that to live is to suffer and try to accept that ~ it’s part of the essence of spirituality.


Smoking and Drinking Will Kill You



many alcoholics are also smokers and gamblers

While there is considerable help from the health professionals to help one to quit smoking, there is very little help for those who want to stop drinking.  Some places have alcohol counseling services, and some don’t.  That doesn’t actually much matter, in my personal experience alcohol counseling services have an abysmally low success rate.  Success in alcohol counseling being measured by how many clients can return to sensible, social drinking.  And, how may clients can abstain from booze completely, over the longer term ~ years not weeks.

The fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous has a higher success rate, among those who genuinely and honestly want to stop drinking.  There are also detoxification and rehabilitation centres, but getting into one of these is difficult and lengthy process, unless one can afford to pay the clinic’s fees.  This is where the terms detox and rehab come from.  Usually, attendance at Alcoholics Anonymous, or Narcotics Anonymous meetings is a condition of the treatment in these clinics.  The 12 Step programmes used by AA and NA are spiritual in nature, and recovery is very unlikely it the alcoholic or drug addict cannot make a spiritual change to their lives.

…one of the primary differences between alcoholics and non-alcoholics is that non-alcoholics change their behaviour to meet their goals and alcoholics change their goals to meet their behaviours. ~ Alcoholics Anonymous.

From personal experience I can tell you that if you drink far too much you are quite likely to find yourself in a hospital’s accident and emergency department, and that is not going to be a load of laughs and unalloyed happiness.  New figures show that heavy drinking resulted in 10 million hospital visits in England in 2013, at a cost to the taxpayer of £2.8 billions.

Excessive alcohol consumption causes chronic illnesses which are both difficult and expensive to treat.  Name any organ in your body, from the brain to the circulatory system in your lower legs, and booze damages it.  Swollen ankles and water retention, are often down to too much booze too often.  Liver failure, too much booze too often.  Mouth and throat cancers, too much booze too often.  Forty-seven percent of all admissions to the National Health Service in England for head and neck cancers, including tumours in the mouth and throat are caused by too much booze too often.  Thirteen percent of cases of breast cancer in women are caused by drinking too much booze to often.  The list goes on; 15% of gastric cancers, 13.5% of high blood pressure cases, 23.4% of epilepsy cases are caused by drinking too much.  There are also innumerable visits to the hospital for alcohol related accidents, including fatal road traffic accidents.  People who drink too much attempt suicide 120 times more than do the general population, alcohol and suicide go together like blood and guts.

Heavy drinking and not eating properly can also result in thiamine deficiency, (vitamin B1), which can be fatal.  Thiamine deficiency can also result in Wernicke’s encephalopathy and Korsakoff’s syndrome.  Thiamine deficiency will affect your memory and make you very confused and very irritable. There is also a condition called polyneuropathy, which I have suffered from, and it’s unpleasant.

Few know Hell as well as a heavy drinker.  Wanting / not wanting to stop drinking are just as bad as one another.  If you stop drinking very suddenly you may give yourself some serious problems, up to but not limited to; grand mal fits and seizures, acute alcoholic withdrawal and delirium tremens , severe false memory syndrome, and death.  This is why it is very dangerous to detox alone.  Coming off tobacco and other drugs may make you feel as though you want to die, but coming off alcohol is the only drug that can actually kill you while you are detoxing.

If you need an excuse for why you don’t drink alcohol, you could say that addiction runs in the family and you don’t want to try it even once because you may not stop until you are dead in a puddle of your own vomit or smashed into the side of a mini-van with children’s body parts scattered around your corpse. ~ Duane Alan Hahn.

Stopping smoking is difficult, tobacco is very addictive.  But there are a plethora of tobacco substitutes which will give you the necessary nicotine hit.  If you’re addicted to tobacco then you will age sooner than you should, and you will die sooner than you should.

Smoking kills.  If you’re killed you’ve lost a very important part of your life. ~ Brooke Shields.

The CDC, (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention), say that tobacco use is the single most preventable cause of disease, disability, and death in the United States.  Each year an estimated 480,000 die prematurely in the USA from smoking or exposure to second hand smoke, and another 8.6 million live with a serious illness caused by tobacco use.

New research by the Intermountain Medical Centre Heart Institute in Murray, Utah shows that heart attacks are not as strongly linked to genetics and family history as was once thought.  What is most likely to give you a heart attack is your lifestyle ~ a bad diet, too much alcohol, smoking, lack of exercise and obesity.

Because coronary disease and heart attacks are so closely related, researchers in the past have assumed that they were the same thing.  They thought that if someone had coronary disease they would eventually have a heart attack.  This finding may help people realise that through their [lifestyle] choices, they have greater control over whether they ultimately have a heart attack. ~ Dr. Benjamin Horne.


smoking harms women more than men

Smoking cigarettes is another lifestyle choice which harms almost every organ in body, causing multiple diseases and impairing health in general.   Smoking cigarettes also causes more deaths than;

  1. Human Immunodeficiency Virus, (HIV / Aids)
  2. Illegal drug use.
  3. Alcohol abuse.
  4. Road traffic accidents.
  5. Firearms incidents.

All added together.

More than 10 times as many American citizens have died prematurely from cigarette smoking than have died in all the wars in American history.

Smoking increases the risk of premature death;

  • From coronary heart disease by 2 to 4 times.
  • From a stroke by 2 to 4 times.
  • Of developing lung cancer by 25 times.

Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic’s best friend. ~ Gerard Way

Women are more at risk than men from smoking and drinking related early death and poor health.  Under no circumstances should women smoke or drink booze if they are pregnant or trying for a baby.  I know from hard evidence that giving up smoking is easier than an alcoholic stopping drinking.  I also know that women are far, far more at risk from smoking and drinking related cancers than are men.

We Gotta Get Out Of This Place

Originally posted on kissmeoutofdesire:

After my shout out on social media that I was wanting to be set up on blind dates, I received a cryptic email from a friend.

You’re reclining on a bough in your ancestral forest home, just lounging away the day like long-lived elves do, when you see a messenger walking carefully through the forest path. You leap down, trying not to frighten the poor human too much, and he nervously pushes a letter into your hand before running away as fast as he can. That’s not so surprising. You and your group of vigilantes, ‘The Leafblowers’ have been trying to overthrow the Emperor for years. You run raids on ‘legitimate establishments’ and cause all sort of trouble to what the sheeple in the big city like to think of as ‘law abiding, tax- and protection-money paying citizens.’ It’s not a surprise that your reputation has preceded you.


View original 894 more words


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